


So Happy I Could Die

by Lynn1998



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Angst, Co-workers, Descriptions of dysphoria, Fluff, Gay Disaster Keith (Voltron), Gay Keith (Voltron), Internalized Transphobia, Keith & Lance (Voltron) are Roommates, M/M, Possible smut, Roommates, Slow Burn, Trans Lance (Voltron), Trans Male Character, Trans Male Lance (Voltron), and they were ROOMMATES, lots of emotions happening my dudes, they work together at a bowling alley
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-02-24
Updated: 2019-05-05
Packaged: 2019-11-04 20:34:27
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 12
Words: 26,167
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17905163
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Lynn1998/pseuds/Lynn1998
Summary: Stars in our eyes ‘cause we’re having a good time.





	1. Annoyance

**Author's Note:**

> FAIR FUCKING WARNING
> 
> A BITCH BE PROJECTING A LOT IN THIS FIC
> 
> LOTS OF GENDER FEELS IN THIS BITCH
> 
> THANKS FOR LETTING ME USE WRITING AS MY THERAPY ILY ALL

     Keith wasn’t interested in women. It was very common knowledge at work. His coworkers were all cool with the fact that he was gay, and it wasn’t even a common topic of discussion. It was just something they all knew. Nothing would change it and nothing made Keith want to change it. He spent too long denying his sexuality at home with his parents. Once he got out he made a promise to himself to never try and hide that part of him. After that he never looked back.

     Living out of the house was tough. He was going to school to become a therapist, and worked everyday of his life. He was full time at the bowling alley in the town next to his home town, and he often went overtime with how dependent his managers were on him. Half the managers had only been at that location for six or eight months while Keith had been there for almost three years. He was offered a manager position many times, but he denied it and said he was too focused on school. Still, he basically had to teach the managers to do their job, but he couldn’t blame them for their cluelessness. The location they worked at was a hell hole.

     It was almost a small town. It had enough big corporations to be a little more economically lucrative, but nonetheless it was small. Keith walked from his appartement to his job within five minutes every day. He could walk to the grocery store in ten minutes, and the doctors office in fifteen. There was a bus stop in the middle of town, and if he needed to go anywhere else he could walk there from any part of the town. That’s how he got to school, and he saved a lot of money by walking around instead of driving. Honestly, he couldn’t complain.

     If there was anything to complain about it was his coworkers. For the majority of the time they were okay, great even, but sometimes they just couldn’t be serious and actually get to work. He could tell it was really difficult for one of the newest managers named Allura. A vein popped in her forehead whenever a certain employee was challenging her and stepping out of line. Shiro was another manager that had been there for almost a year, so he wasn’t phased by her. Coran had been there for six months and he was barely getting comfortable with her nonsense. Keith didn’t really have a good opinion of her either.

“Lacey, don’t you think there’s a _better_  time to apply your highlighter?” Allura asked through clenched teeth. Lacey hummed and continued to swirl golden sparkles on her cheeks with her brush.

“Mmmmmaybe…but I needed a touch up really bad,” she said. Keith peeked over from the shoe station.

“Well, I don’t care if-“

“Ms. McClain, please,” Shiro interrupted. Lacey put down her brush and smiled at the manager.

“You know I can’t say no when you say my name like that,” she winked. Keith felt like he was gonna be sick. Shiro smiled and shook his head.

“Whatever it takes for you to do your job. Number seven needs cleaning up,” he said. Lacey sighed and shut her compact.

“Fine.”

     Lacey McClain was one of the biggest nuisances in Keith life. Never mind how long it took the bus to pick him up from his night classes. Never mind all the entitled and picky customers he had to deal with on a daily basis. Never mind his annoying classmates that texted him at godawful hours in the morning. Lacey McClain was possibly the biggest airhead Keith has ever had the displeasure of meeting. Despite being half a year older than him, Lacey was always one push away from being knocked on her boney ass. She was almost always late, never wore her name tag, and had to be reminded to put her hair up. It was painful witnessing her disgraceful dysfunctional habits.

     There were many times that she was called in outside of her availability, and her response was always along the lines of being at school. Apparently she went to beauty school. Apparently meaning she mentioned it at any opportunity she could. Keith was almost sick of it whenever she mentioned it, but at least she was talking instead of dreadfully flirting with anything with legs. It was annoying, but Keith was usually the one to call her in or deal with her since he knew her the longest. She started working there a little under a year ago, so naturally Keith had no problem putting her in her place.

“God, I’m _so_  glad Shiro managed to stick around for so long,” Lacey sighed as she leaned on Keith’s counter. He glanced at her as he wiped down the table, but decided to ignore her. “C’mon, don’t tell me you don’t think he’s cute.”

“He’s old enough to be your dad,” Keith told her.

“Oh I _know_ ,” she hummed and looked at the managed from across the alley.

“Aren’t you supposed to be cleaning up the tables? We need to get out of here by eleven,” Keith informed her.

“Do you _see_  any dirty tables?” She sassed. Keith looked out at the alley and sighed when he didn’t spot a single crumb.

“Nice. Now go bother someone else,” he replied.

“You don’t really think that, do you?” Lacey said with a flirtation smile. Keith looked her dead in the eyes.

“You know I’m gay, so shut it,” he snapped. She blinked and crossed her arms. Keith recognized the hurt in her eyes, and felt bad. “Sorry…just…help out Hunk I’m the kitchen,” he instructed. Lacey nodded and left the counter. Her long brown hair whipping behind her as she nearly ran away. Keith sighed and shook his head.

     The next time Keith saw Lacey he almost didn’t recognize her. At first he thought that they hired a new employee as he watched her bounce across the floor. It had been a few days, and the lack of a long brown ponytail was the first thing Keith noticed. He almost confused her with a man. Her pixie cut a little too geometric to be considered a feminine haircut. Her face was bare of any type of makeup, and her shirt was baggier than before. It was only when she brought back a pair of bowling shoes from table five did Keith notice her blue nail polish and connected the dots. He looked at her with furrowed brows, and she seemed to be avoiding his eyes.

“Lacey?” He asked. Her brilliant blue eyes finally shot up to him, and she bit her lip. “What…happened?”

“Nothing,” she replied. Her once light and airy voice was replaced with a diluted monotone. Her cheeks were red and she rubbed the back of her neck self consciously. Keith furrowed his brows.

“You used to have like two feet of hair. Did you like get tired of it?” He questioned. Lacey moved her hand up to play with the brown locks and laughed nervously.

“I mean…I dunno. It was getting in the way,” she replied. Keith nodded.

“Makes sense. You’re shit at putting it up anyways,” he said. She laughed a little more genuinely and crossed her arms.

“Yeah. I really sucked at that,” she agreed. Keith leaned his arms on the counter.

“Did someone at school do it for you?”

“Yeah, my friend Shay. She usually does men’s cuts, but…she was willing to do a pixie.”

“It looks good,” he said. Lacey blushed again and looked away.

“I gotta…go clean tables,” She stammered. Keith nodded.

“Sounds good. Glad you’re doing your job,” he replied. 

     She nodded once before scampering off. Keith resumed his cleaning, and couldn’t help but glance over at her from time to time. There was something off about her. Maybe not off, but there was definitely something different. It was hard to put his finger on it, but as he watched her walk around and take peoples order he felt as if he was watching an entirely different person. She was still talkative and helpful. Her smile hasn’t changed one bit, but she seemed to have a level of confidence Keith hadn’t seen before. It was odd that she had done a complete one eighty when she was talking to Keith, but he chalked that up to their less than pleasant encounter from the last time they saw each other.

     When the weekend came Keith took that time to focus on homework and classes. The bulk of his studies happened on the weekends, so he was always in his books at home. On occasion he’d come into work if it was a hectic day, but he for the most part stayed home. If he wasn’t working or studying he was sleeping. That was all he had time for. Thankfully that weekend didn’t have a lot of homework, and his professors were gracious enough to go easy on him. For the first time in a long time he finally had some time to himself. He took that time to de-stress with his roommates cat and nap. When he woke up he had to go to work again, and so started the cycle again.

“Lacey! For Christ’s sake, would it kill you to take this seriously?”

     Keith froze as he walked into work. The alley still hasn’t opened, and he looked between Allura and Lacey. Both of them looked upset. Allura was more angry, and Lacey looked more hurt. Either way, it wasn’t something Keith liked walking into. The employee looked at the manager and crossed her arms defensively.

“I don’t know why you think I don’t,” she murmured.

“ _Because_  all you do is waste time and daydream,” Allura snapped.

“Allura, please-“

“Shiro, this really isn’t the time,” Allura interrupted curtly. Shiro sighed and ran his fingers through his hair.

“Sorry, I just…have a lot on my plate right now. I promise I’ll get better at-“

“Honestly, Lacey, I wish I could believe you.”

“Allura-“

“I don’t think I have any other option but to let you-“

“Enough,” Keith said.

     Allura, Shiro, and Lacey all looked up at him. Shiro looked happy to see Keith. Allura looked like a dog with their tail between their legs. Lacey looked like she was about to cry. He walked over and looked at Allura.

“That’s not your call to make,” he said sternly. “Shiro is the general manager, and he decides which employees stay and which ones are let go.”

“But-“

“He’s right, Allura,” Shiro said. She frowned and shook her head walking away.

“Fine,” she muttered. Lacey let out a deep breath she was obviously holding on to for a long time.

“Thanks for that,” Shiro said to Keith. He then turned to Lacey. “She does have a point. I’m not going to let you go because you’re really good with customers, but you do need to be more present,” he told her. Lacey nodded looking down at her feet. “I’ll check in with you later,” he said and followed Allura into the office. Keith was about to walk away with him, but stopped when he heard Lacey speak up.

“I’m sorry,” she said. He turned back and looked at her. She still had her arms crossed, but it looked like she was more trying to comfort herself than defend herself. Keith stepped closer to her and rubbed her shoulder.

“You’re okay,” he told her quietly. She nodded.

“I…yeah. I think I’ll be okay,” she agreed looking up at him and wiping her tears. Keith smiled at her and gently squeezed her shoulder. She sniffled again. “Do you…do you ever feel like you’re in a movie?” She asked. Keith’s smile flickered in confusion.

“A movie?” He questioned.

“Yeah, like…” her eyes darted to the side. “Like you’re playing a role? Or like you’re living how you think you should be living? And…a-a-and no one really sees you for who you really are? Like, not even yourself?” Keith bit his lip.

“Kind of…when I was living at home I was pretty deep in the closet. It felt like I had to be straight, or at least act straight for my parents,” he replied. She looked at him again.

“What if it was physical?” Keith frowned.

“Physical?”

“Yeah, like…if feels like a costume?”

“Um…I dunno. I can’t say I’ve felt like that,” he replied. Lacey looked down and shook her head.

“Sorry…I was just curious…”

“Are you good?” Keith asked. She nodded and turned her head away.

“Yeah. I’m gonna start setting up the tables,” she said. Keith nodded.

“Okay…”


	2. Confessions

     After a while things started to settle and get back to normal. Lacey was still her charismatic and flirty self, but there was always something about her that was different. At first Keith thought he was the only one who noticed until Shiro said he did too. They didn’t discuss it any further since it wasn’t any of their business, but Keith couldn’t help but be intrigued. 

     The only way he could explain it was that she looked more like herself. Her smile was more genuine, and her laugh was louder and sweeter. Before it was diluted and sounded like a playback track from a sitcom. Now it just sounded like Lacey. She kept her hair short, and even went to different hairstyles. She had a fade, and a quiff, and even the classic fuckboy type of haircut. Finally she settled on something short and shaggy. It suited her the best, and Keith found he liked the way it looked on her. It made her eyes brighter with contentment, and her face sharper. It was almost like a missing piece finally reunited with her.

     Lacey had kept her hair short like that for six months. It was almost like she never had long hair in the first place. The way it fell off her shoulders was like a burden, and so to see her so free just felt natural. It reflected in her work ethic. Funny how all they needed to do to get her to cooperate was cut her hair.

“God, tonight was busy,” she sighed as she leaned against the shoe counter. Keith nodded in agreement as he organized the different sizes. “I’ll admit it was kinda stressful guarding the door. Friday’s really are a pain in the ass.”

“Yeah, have you just figured that out?” Keith teased. Lacey laughed a little and shook her head.

“Maybe…I dunno. I’ve been more focused on other stuff,” she said.

“How’s school going?” Keith asked. Lacey looked up at him.

“Are you…actually asking about my life?” She asked. Keith paused and then shrugged.

“I guess so. Are you really gonna say no to an opportunity to talk about yourself?” Keith retorted. Lacey smiled.

“It’s going really good. I’m actually almost ready to take my practicals in the spring,” she said.

“What’s a practical?” Keith asked turning to face her as he cleaned off a particularly dirty shoe.

“It’s like the technical test. Actually performing a haircut and a hairstyle. Applying color, different massage movements, nail sculptures,” she answered. Keith nodded.

“Sounds like it’s kinda stressful,” he said. She shrugged.

“Yeah…but it’ll be worth it. I’ll be licensed near the middle of the new year, and then I can start looking for jobs in the city,” she replied. Keith paused for a moment.

“The city?” He asked. Lacey nodded.

“Yeah. That’s where the money is. Haircuts can be up to fifty dollars,” she replied.

“Shit.”

“Yeah, no kidding.”

“So…you’ll be like…not here?” He asked. Lacey nodded.

“Yeah, I’ll be…on my own,” she said. Keith furrowed his brows.

“Like you won’t be working here?” He didn’t know why this was hard for himself to understand. Lacey laughed again.

“Like I would work here any longer than I need to. Why? Would you miss me?” She teased. Keith blinked at her and paused to think for a moment.

“I dunno…I think I might,” he said truthfully. Lacey bit her lip shyly and leaned down to rub her nape with both hands.

“That’s…kinda sweet,” she murmured. Keith felt himself turn red and then shrugged.

“I mean…you’re kinda like a sister to me, so…” he said. He could see Lacey’s shoulders fall, and he instantly knew he said the wrong thing.

“Yeah…a sister,” she repeated. Keith didn’t know what to reply with.

“Lace-“

“I should clock out. I should’ve clocked out like ten minutes ago,” she said. Keith shut his mouth and then nodded.

“Yeah…that sounds good,” he replied.

     Lacey promptly left, and Keith couldn’t help but feel like he fucked something up. The whole thing was confusing, and he wasn’t sure what to make of it. He knew for a fact that he was one hundred percent without a doubt gay. He’s never had feelings for a woman before, and he was certain he never would…but he couldn’t explain the emotions Lacey stirred up inside him. Perhaps it really was like a sister and a brother. Maybe he just didn’t know how to have a close friend. Maybe he was just over thinking this and Lacey was fine. Either way he felt weird and he didn’t know why.

     Keith worked that next Monday. He had the busiest weekend of his life starting his new term, and it showed when he clocked in. His eyes felt heavy with the lack of sleep he didn’t miss between summer term and fall term. Useless facts were bouncing around his head as he made his way to the shoe counter through the back, and his limbs felt stiff from sitting and studying so long. He yawned every few minutes, and his head was pulsing from the lack of sleep. In other words, he felt like shit.

     The bowling alley was slow like it was every Monday. He was thankful that there were only a couple of tables taken, and it didn’t take him long to spot Lacey. She whipped between tables, but was noticeably lingering at the middle one. He watched her chat with the people, and assumed they must’ve been friends. She laughed loudly, and for some reason Keith likes seeing her so happy. She walked their tray back to the food counter when she spotted Keith.

“Hey!” She called and set down the tray before jogging over. “I hope you don’t mind, but some of my friends are here,” she said with a smile. Keith looked over at the table of people with various hair colors and styles.

“Really? I couldn’t tell,” he replied blandly. She rolled her eyes and leaned her elbows on the table.

“You look like shit,” she said. Keith shrugged.

“New term,” he said.

“Sounds like hell.”

“You don’t even know,” he sighed and ran his hand down his face. Lacey giggled and moved her hand to gently fiddle with Keith’s sleeve.

“Maybe you should tell me more about it? What’s campus life at a four year?” She asked. Keith chuckled and watched perfectly manicured blue nails mess with his uniform.

“I got about five hours of sleep during the entire weekend, and I’d say I want to kill myself but the sleep deprivation might beat me too it,” he told her. She bit her lip as they made eye contact and then smiled.

“What are you studying?”

“Psychology…sociology…all that shit to be a therapist,” he answered.

“Sounds like fun. Do you wanna specialize in anything?” She asked leaning a little closer. Keith didn’t flinch or even try to pull back when Lacey moved her hand up his forearm and gently rubbed his arm with her thumb.

“LGBT. Mostly the G. I…could’ve used a therapist to help me figure out how to cope with my parents after I moved out. It’s hard getting rid of the guilt,” he said. Lacey nodded, her smile dampening a little.

“Yeah…Yeah, I get that,” she said looking down at their arms. Keith’s fingers gently brushed against Lacey’s arm, and that made her smile come back. She then took a deep breath. “Keith, there’s something I need to tell you,” she announced. Keith blinked and then nodded.

“Okay. What’s up?” He asked. She took a moment to gather her courage, and felt herself shake as Keith moved his fingers to give her an encouraging squeeze.

“I’m-“

“Lance!”

     Lacey froze with wide eyes. Her group of friends were all looking at her, and when Keith looked over at them it was obvious they were referring to her. He furrowed his brows in confusion, and watched the color drain from Lacey’s face.

“Hey, Lance! We want more chicken strips, man!” Her friend called. Keith looked at the group with confusion, and then at Lacey when she let go of his arm.

“I…I-I gotta go,” she murmured. Keith felt even more confused than before.

“Lacey-“

“C’mon _Lance!_ “ her friend called again.

“Kelly, shut up!” Another friend snapped.

     It was obvious that Lacey wasn’t happy with what was happening. Keith watched her scamper off to the food counter before returning to her group of friends. She set down the tray gently before turning one eighty and walking off to the break room. Her table of friends were left in silence. The entire room was tense, and Keith didn’t like that. He also didn’t like that Lacey’s friends were all obviously looking at him and whispering amongst themselves. Keith took that as a sign to get out and check on Lacey.

     Before he even walked into the break room, he could hear Lacey’s voice on the phone. He was never good at eavesdropping, but he could tell from her tone that she was upset and on the verge of tears. Sniffles came from the room, and he could tell she was probably on the phone. Based on her reaction to earlier, Keith was probably the last person she wanted to talk to, but Keith didn’t care. His gut told him to open the door and sit with her, and so he did.

“…a-a-and he just…stood there, and-“ Lacey stopped talking as Keith walked in. She looked at him with wide eyes before turning away. “Um…I gotta go,” she murmured. Keith took a seat across from her. “Yeah…y-yeah I’ll text you…okay…bye.” She hung up the phone.

     They sat in silence for a moment. Keith was suddenly very focused on his hang nails, and Lacey was the most silent she had been in her life. Soon enough, it was starting to bother Keith, so he took a deep breath and leaned back with his arms crossed. Lacey finally looked up at him and they made eye contact.

“What’s up?” Keith asked. It was kinda stupid the way he said it, but essentially that’s what he wanted to know. Lacey blinked and looked away as a tear rolled down her face. Her eyes were red.

“Nothing,” she lied.

“Lacey, what’s going on?” He asked more directly. She shook her head and hugged herself.

“N-Nothing…it’s not important,” her voice trembled.

“Lacey-“

“I’m not…” she stopped herself and shook her head more. “I’m just…” Keith uncrossed his arms and leaned forward on the table.

“Lace, you can talk to me, okay?” He said. Lacey was silent. “Look…I know our friendship is a little… _rocky_ …but like…I wanna know what’s going on, okay? I wanna make sure you’re alright,” he said. Lacey sniffled again and wiped her nose. She shook her head.

“Lace-“

“I’m trans!” She blurted. Keith completely stopped and stared. All of the sudden, everything made sense. Lacey sniffled again and hugged herself even tighter. “…I’m trans…” she repeated quieter. 

     Keith blinked and then frowned. He then stood up and watched Lacey flinch as his chair groaned against the floor. She tensed up more as Keith walked over to her, but was very surprised when he knelt down and hugged her tightly. Eventually, she unwrapped her arms from around herself and then wrapped them around Keith.

“I’m trans,” she breathed. Keith squeezed her.

“That’s okay.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaadd me on Snapchat and comment your user and I’ll add u bak
> 
> ksenialynns


	3. acquainted

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

“So…how long have you known?” Keith asked. Lance shrugged and picked at his sandwich.

“I dunno…it kinda hit me when you said you weren’t into women and told me to shut it, and I just…I thought about my attraction to people…my biases and how they make me feel, and…” he trailed off in thought. “I dunno. I’ve never been comfortable with the idea of being a woman with a woman. I think that held me back a lot, and when I envision myself as a _man_ with a woman, or a man with a man…I dunno, it just feels right,” he said. Keith nodded.

“That makes sense.”   


“It’s all really confusing, but…I just started injections last week, and I’ve already changed my name legally,” he continued.

“So you were just gonna let me misgender you and call you the wrong name?” Keith questioned with a raised brow. Lance blushed and looked up from his sandwich.   


“I…I didn’t know how you’d react, and if you reacted badly, I would rather you misgender me a million times a day than never speak to me again,” he explained. Keith took a second to fully take in that sentence before nodding.

“…right…”   


“I haven’t even shown Shiro and Allura my papers to change it in the system. Like, I’m too scared to do it.”

“They’re not gonna fire you if that’s what you’re scared of, Lace,” he told him.   


“Lance,” he corrected. Keith blinked and then nodded.

“Right…sorry, I didn’t-“   


“You don’t have to explain. It’s hard to change it. My friends took a few months to get used to it.”

“A few _months?_  Jesus Christ, how long have you been keeping this away from me?” He questioned. Lance shrugged.   


“I only started coming out at the beginning of summer,” he said. Keith ran his fingers through his hair.

“Sorry, I just…I wish you would’ve trusted me with this sooner, but…I can understand because we have a better relationship now than before…” he rubbed his eyes. He was way too tired for this.

“Yeah, but…I was planning on telling you before my friends…did that. Um…but I thought about telling you a million times,” he said. Keith nodded.   


“I can believe that. You’re an over thinker,” he said. Lance rolled his eyes.

“No I’m not,” he muttered. Keith cracked a smile.   


“You know you are.” Lance shook his head.

“I just plan things out.”   


“By over thinking them.”

“ _No_ , by doing a thorough analysis-“   


“By over thinking.”

“ _Oh_ my god,” Lance couldn’t help but laugh. Keith laughed with him and smiled at the genuine happiness of Lance’s face.   


“It suits you,” Keith said. Lance settled down and took a breath.

“What does?” He asked.   


“All of it…I noticed there was something different. The way you hold yourself…your hair…your laugh…just…everything really suits you,” he explained. Lance smiled and then shrugged.

“I’m just being me,” he replied. Keith smirked.   


“I like that.” Red invaded Lance’s face and he looked away to try and hide it. Keith stood up and gently nudged his shoulder before walking away. “Enjoy your lunch. I’ll see you out there,” he said. Lance nodded and watched Keith walk away.

    Things got a little less confusing on Keith’s end. Make no mistake, being attracted to Lance was always going to be confusing no matter what gender he was, but it was less confusing now that he knew Lance was trying to be read as male. Keith was starting to realize he might’ve been reading Lance as male for a lot longer than he originally thought. Sure, he didn’t know for sure, but there was that something about him that he noticed. He was still noticing it.

     The following week, Lance finally told Shiro and Allura about his name change, and they instantly ordered him a new name tag. He was given a temporary one in the meantime, but any name tag with his correct name made him happy. Keith smiled when he noticed it, and realized it was the first time he saw Lance wear his name tag in a long time. He walked around with it placed proudly on his chest and he greeted everyone with the biggest smile Keith had seen on him. It was funny how much Lance’s happiness influenced Keith’s happiness.    


    The middle of the week was starting to feel more and more lonely when Lance wasn’t there. Sure he was at school, and Keith was glad he took his education seriously, but he couldn’t help the nagging need to see his smiling face again. Even though he knew that smiling face came with god awful pickup lines and teasing phrases and annoying complaints, he still craved it. Little did he know Lance craved him just as much.

“Hello?” Keith answered his phone as it rang during his break.   


“Hey! Are you off any time soon?” Lance asked on the other end. His voice had deepened a little in the past month. Keith checked his watch.

“Uh…I got like a couple hours left,” he replied.   


“Perfect! I left my bag in my locker. Can you pretty please come into town and bring it to me? I left my shears in there and I have a haircut later tonight,” he said. Keith blinked.

“Uh…Yeah sure,” he replied.   


“Oh my god, thank you so much,” he sighed. “Get on the thirteen bus and get off at the fifteenth stop. My school is like right across the street, you can’t miss it.”

“Okay. I’ll see you then,” Keith said.   


“Okay. Thank you so much, dude. You’re really saving my ass. Everyone and their mother has a haircut tonight, so I can’t borrow anyone’s shears.”

“Uh, no problem.”   


“Okay, I have a facial to do now, but seriously, thank you so much.”

“Yeah. It’s no biggie,” he murmured.   


“See ya then!”

“See ya…”   


    They hung up and then Keith immediately received a message from Lance with his locker number and combo. He got up to return to the shoe station, but found himself distracted by the fact that he was gonna go see Lance at his school. It was weird to think about, but he couldn’t deny he was almost _excited_  to see him again. He had a class later that night, but he had more than enough time to drop off his scissors since he’d already be in town. Just thinking about Lance being seen with him by his classmates made him even more excited. Two hours have never felt longer in his life.

    Once he clocked out, he opened his locker and checked to make sure Lance’s shears were inside. He then took the bag and opened his own locker to toss his uniform shirt inside and grab his own bag. The thirteen bus arrived within ten seconds after Keith got to the bus stop, and fifteen stops happened a lot faster than he was expecting. He got off the bus, and surely enough, Lance’s school was loud and proud across the street. He walked in and was immediately overwhelmed by the environment he was tossed into.

“Can I help you?” Someone at the front desk asked. Keith walked over and looked around hoping to see Lance.   


“Uh…I have Lance’s bag. He’s a student here,” he said. The lady nodded and reached for a phone.

“Got it…Lance to the retail floor. Lance to the retail floor,” her voice announced throughout the building. She put down the phone. “He should be here in a minute.”   


“Thanks-“

“Oh thank, god!” Keith looked over towards the sound of Lance’s voice and suddenly found himself with an armful of the other man. “Thank you so much, I _just_  finished setting up for this haircut,” he said pulling back. Keith was red in the face as he handed Lance his bag.

“Yeah…Yeah, no problem,” he stammered. Lance took his bag and couldn’t stop smiling at Keith. He then cleared his throat and finally found his voice again.

“Um…so how are you?” He asked. Keith wetted his lower lip and shrugged.   


“Alright. I just got off, and I have class in like an hour,” he said. Lance nodded.

“That’s good. I hope I didn’t inconvenience you by asking you to come over here,” he said. Keith shook his head and pointed north.   


“My campus is like five stops that way, so I’m just kinda early,” he assured him. Lance nodded.

“Yeah, well…thanks for coming over. Really, I was scared I was gonna get sent home, and I’m already super behind on hours. I had to come in early today,” he said. Keith furrowed his brows.   


“Hours?”

“Yeah, it’s an hourly based program. If you’re absent you need to literally makeup every hour or else you’ll have to pay for every day you’re outside of your contract,” he explained.   


“Damn. That sounds intense,” Keith said leaning against the desk. Lance nodded and rubbed the back of his neck.

“Yeah, it’s basically like working a second job.”   


“Sounds tough. So you like take clients everyday?”

“Yeah, it’s for practice. Sometimes a get tips, so that’s a plus,” he said.   


“Really? That’s kinda cool.” Lance blushed a little.

“Yeah, I usually spend it on coffee and gas.”   


“Why gas? Do you actually drive around town?” He asked. Lance shook his head.

“No, my siblings are more south. They still talk to me, so it’s nice to see them. Plus they help me with car and health insurance in exchange for me doing yard work.”   


“Still talk to you? What do you mean?” Keith furrowed his brows. Lance let his hand drop and rubbed his arm.

“Uh…my parents kinda…stopped talking to me after I came out. Then they stopped letting me come home, so…I’ve been staying at friends houses and applying to apartments,” he told him quietly. Keith frowned.   


“How long ago was that?”

“…a couple months ago.” Keith felt his heart drop.   


“Lance-“

“I-I didn’t think it was important-“   


“Of _course_ , it’s important, idiot. I would’ve helped out if you just told me,” Keith said. Lance bit his lip.

“You would’ve?” Keith nodded.   


“Yeah, of course. Seriously, it’s like you think I don’t care about you,” Keith said. Lance smiled a little.

“You care about me?” Keith blushed and looked down.   


“I mean…yeah. I see you like all the time.”

“You see me like twice a week,” Lance sassed. Keith rolled his eyes.   


“Two days for the past year,” he replied. Lance merely giggled and shook his head.

“I guess, but…thanks. I care about you too,” he replied. Keith looked down and shrugged.   


“ _Lance_ , _your_ _guest_ _has_ _arrived_. _Lance_ , _your_ _guest_ _as_ _arrived_.” Lance looked at the lady behind the desk and seemed to share a wordless exchange. He then smiled at Keith again.

“That’s me. Thanks again. I’ll see you Friday,” he said before accepting the paper from the lady. Keith nodded and started to walk back.   


“See ya…”

    He felt weird going to class after that. His heart definitely took a beating during that conversation, and he couldn’t deny he was upset to hear Lance’s parents disowned him and that he was basically homeless at the moment. It was hard to concentrate to his professor when his mind was preoccupied with ways he could help out Lance. He was surprised when his classmates started to get up and he realized he hard barely written down a page of notes. Thankfully, he recorded the lecture on his phone, but even then that was the last thing on his mind.

    When he got home his roommate was rummaging through their fridge. Keith rolled his eyes and sat on the couch as his roomie pulled random food and piled it on a plate. Then he noticed moving boxes in the corner and frowned.   


“Uh, are you going somewhere?” He asked.

“Oh, yeah. My girlfriend said she was moving to Arizona for school, so I transferred there. I’m moving when the lease is up next week,” he said. Keith blinked at the boxes and felt a very bad idea creep up on him. “I hope you don’t mind, dude. If you want, I can help you find a new roomie-“   


“Nah…” Keith said and ran his fingers through his hair. “I think I got it covered.”


	4. Roomies

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> TW: needles, testosterone shots, talks about dysphoria

“You want me to move in with you?”

Now that it was said out loud, Keith realized it was kind of a dumb idea. Still, he was determined to go through with it. He nodded and leaned his elbows on the counter. In all honesty he was still trying to figure out his idea himself.

“My lease is up next week, and my roommate is moving out. All I need is a deposit and your signature,” he answered. Lance bit his lip.

“How much is the deposit?”   


“Like…it’s a shit apartment, so like basically two months of rent…that would be eighteen hundred dollars. We’d split it too since we’d both be on the lease, so you’d only have to pay nine hundred. After that like four fifty a month,” he said. Lance thought for a moment and then nodded.

“Okay…I have enough for the deposit. I think I can do the monthly stuff, but…I dunno. I might not be able to cover every month,” he confessed. Keith shrugged.

“My old roommate was shit at paying his rent. Like every month I’d have to front the bill and he’d eventually pay me back. He _still_ owes me like twelve hundred dollars from the whole time we’ve lived together. I’m full time so I could basically live by myself. If you can’t make it, just let me know and we can work something out,” he said. Lance nodded.

“Okay. Sounds good…thanks for doing this,” he said. Keith noticed the way he shamefully looked away, and touched his hand.   


“Hey…I’ve been there, dude,” he said. Lance looked at him. “It’s really hard getting out there on your own. I left on my own and I didn’t get on my feet until like a year later. It’s not easy,” he assured him. Lance nodded.

“Yeah…”   


“I’ve been evicted a couple times before I could finally land a full time job and fit it with my schedule, so like don’t worry. Like as long as you’re trying, man.” Lance smiled and then reached across the counter to hug him. Keith was still trying to get used to Lance’s spontaneous hugs, but apart of him didn’t want to because the surprise was usually the best part.

“Thank you so much.” Keith reciprocated the hug and rubbed his thumb against Lance’s shoulder.   


“Of course…”

    While he didn’t regret asking Lance to live with him, it was definitely not well thought out and inevitably a mistake. It had nothing to do with their bickering and everything to do with the feelings festering in Keith’s chest. The first week, he was still getting used to waking up and walking into his living room to find Lance already up, eating his cereal. By the second week, it was still weird, but he was kinda getting used to it. It only took three days for Keith to finally have an idea of how incredibly _busy_ Lance was. 

    Every day Lance had off from the alley he was at school for at least eight hours, and some mornings he wasn’t even there. Keith quickly found out that Lance had a second job at a coffee place on the outskirts of town that he’d pick up a shift for on the way to school. Some days, he wouldn’t see Lance until ten o’clock at night, and that was when Keith didn’t have a night class. Most of the time if Keith saw Lance at home, he was passed out on the couch still in his clothes from school. If that was the case, Keith would cover him in a blanket and turn off the lights before hopping in the shower.

    The hardest part of living with Lance was how much more Keith missed him when they were apart. Weekends were suddenly less stressful when Lance was in the room to keep him company while studying. Monday’s and Friday’s were more bearable when Keith had someone to walk to work and back home with. It was nice being able to stay up late with him talking about random things and falling deeper and deeper into his bright blue eyes.   


    The first month, Lance was fifty dollars short, but Keith didn’t even care. He knew Lance was paying out of pocket for his hormone treatments and doctor visit copays, so he didn’t press and just said Lance could pay it back another time. Money wasn’t really a concern to Keith. He was more so concerned about finding someone he could actually live with and not totally hate all the time. Lance was the last person he’d expect would be his perfect roommate. Maybe he was a little biased, but he was still in denial about his little crush.

“You don’t have to be in the same room, y’know,” Lance said as he pushed the needle into his thigh. Keith shrugged and continued flipping through his books on Lance’s bed.

“I’m here for support,” he said. Lance chuckled and shook his head.

“Thanks. That really warms my heart,” he said sarcastically. Keith smirked to himself and flipped another page and writing more notes.   


“That’s the goal.” 

    Lance pushed on the syringe and held it there for a second before pulling it out and capping it. He then tossed it in his sharps container and stood up to pull up his pants. Keith kept his eyes on his book as Lance flopped down on his bed on his stomach. Books flopped with him and he poked at the inch of skin between Keith’s pants and his shirt.   


“You’re like really pale,” Lance said.

“I don’t really have time to tan up,” Keith replied. Lance smiled and let his finger linger on his waist.   


“Your hips are like really small,” Lance observed. Keith looked over at him and raised a brow.

“We literally have the same waist size in pants. You’re just a thirty, thirty four because you’re a fricken giant.”   


“Yeah, but yours _look_ smaller,” Lance said with longing eyes. Keith realized what Lance meant, and rolled over to look at him closer.

“Lance…” the other man turned his head into the mattress. “You’re hips are fine, okay?” Lance groaned and shook his head.   


“‘M sorry…I shouldn’t talk about it like that.”

“Hey, it’s okay,” Keith said sitting up. Lance turned on his back and grabbed his pillow to hold against his chest.   


“I just…I wish it was all _enough_ ,” he whispered.

“What do you mean?”   


“The hormones, the therapy…everything. I just…”he sighed. “I wish it would just go away. This voice that tells me I just look like…like a fricken dyke,” he furrowed his brows.

“Lance…”   


“And like, I dunno. Maybe I shouldn’t have started hormones. Maybe I could’ve just been content with dressing more masculine and dating girls instead of guys. Maybe I’m making a huge mistake that I’ll regret in fucking ten years,” he rambled.

“Lance, I don’t think-“   


“Maybe I’m just not meant for this. I-I mean sometimes I can’t help but feel like I _did_ make a mistake and that I should de-transition, but…that voice keeps making me go on,” Lance said. Keith reached out and rubbed his arm.

“Lance, I can’t even pretend to know what you’re going through, but trust me…you seem a lot happier than you did nine months ago,” he assured him. Lance looked up at him with furrowed brows.

“Really?” He asked. Keith nodded.   


“Definitely. Dude, the minute you cut your hair I felt it. It was like a weight was taken off your shoulders. Like you could finally be yourself,” he said. Lance smiled at that.

“I did hate having all that hair. God. It was so annoying.” Keith chuckled and let his hand trail down to Lance’s elbow. Lance moved his arm a little closer and Keith touched at the space of his arm that was previously blocked his his ribs.

“You look better without it,” he hummed.   


    Lance nodded in agreement and closed his eyes. Keith took that moment and allowed himself to look down at the other man as he collected himself. He then opened his eyes to check the time and sighed.

“I need to get going soon. I have the closing shift today,” he said. Keith snapped out of it and nodded.

“Yeah, go ahead. I’ll see you tonight,” he said. Lance pulled himself off the bed and quickly dressed himself in his bowling alley uniform. It was kinda weird how comfortable they were changing around each other. Although Lance still only wiggled into his binder when Keith wasn’t in the room. He picked up his bag and walked out of his room.

“See ya tonight!” He called.   


“See ya…”

    Whenever Keith had the apartment to himself he couldn’t help but indulge in stress relieving activities. That’s a more polite way to say he whacked it in his bed room and then took a bath. Usually that’s how his Saturday’s went after Lance left for his shift. For the longest time Keith had managed not to think about Lance at all when he was balls deep in his fist, and the only way he had managed that was by watching a shit ton of porn while he did it.

    First thing he always did was clean up his studying materials. After that he would mull over it for the few minutes it took for him to walk to his bedroom. The minute he got on his bed he’d pull out his phone and scroll through different videos before eventually picking one and starting it. Keith was the kinda person to watch the entire shitty introduction scene and laugh at it before pulling out his dick. Today was kinda different because his internet router was being difficult that week. The video kept buffering and the site took a long time to load. Eventually he had to exit the app entirely and put his phone down.

    So there he was. Dick half hard and nothing but his imagination to keep him going. He really  _really_ didn’t want to think about something. While he was still in denial about his crush, he wasn’t too far gone to deny he was attracted to Lance. He had really changed since he started transitioning. Like both physically and mentally and emotionally. He was still essentially _Lance_ and he was still very much the same person that Keith was dreading to see everyday nine months ago. The only thing different was that he was more enjoyable to be around now that he was being true to himself. Also he made a much cuter boy than a girl.

    Lance had always been “cute”. He would get hit on all the time by boys at work. His fluttery eyelashes and long brown hair brought him a lot of attention, and anyone could see his pretty face. He still had a pretty face, and Keith wished he would’ve told him sooner. Really everything about Lance was pretty. He was thin and lanky, but Keith was kind of into that. His legs were nice and long, and Keith had troubles not peeking at his long limbs when he walked around in his boxers. Everything about him was long really, and Keith loved it.

    It took him a couple minutes to realize he was, in fact, jerking it while he was thinking about Lance. His head hit the pillow and he groaned in shame. He was tempted to just stop and take a cold shower, but he couldn’t help but continue. What could it hurt? He was already harboring feelings, what would another little secret change?   


    And so, he let his fantasies go wild. He thought about Lance under him. Lance writhing in pleasure. Lance gasping and begging for more. His fingers inside him. His _dick_ inside him. He briefly wondered if that would bother Lance, and then carried on with his fantasy. Touching, kissing, holding, squeezing, caressing his skin and his body. It was beautiful. The tan skin that covered him, and the way it stretched over his bones. He was soft and supple, and while he probably thought that would make him more girly, Keith only thought that made him more attractive. What finally won him over was imagining the look on Lance’s face when Keith would fuck him, and creamed himself the minute he imagined those intense blue eyes staring back at him.

    He laid there in shame, staring up at his ceiling for a few long minutes. His cum all over his chest, and his face covered in complete and utter horror from the scene that unfolded in his brain. Keith finally grabbed a nearby sock and wiped off his stomach. He pulled down his shirt and put away his dick and got up to grab some food. God, he really didn’t think this through.


	5. Constant

“I never would’ve thought you and Lance would live together one day,” Shiro said. Keith hummed and watched Lance from his shoe station.

“Me neither,” he mumbled. His eyes following his every move.   


“I figured you guys would bicker too much.”

“Sometimes. We usually end up forgetting the problem after we end the conversation,” he mumbled absentmindedly. Shiro chuckled.

“You alright there, bud? You’re sounding a little monotoned,” he noticed. Keith shrugged and bit his lip when Lance bent over to pick something up.   


“‘M just a little tired.”

“Yeah?” Keith smiled as Lance came closer and leaned his palms on the counter.

“Hey Shiro,” he greeted with a smile.   


“Hello, Lance,” Shiro replied.

“Kinda slow for a Friday, huh?”   


“Yeah, kinda,” Shiro agreed. Lance nodded and then leaned on his elbows when he turned to Keith.

“Hey,” his smile suddenly turned bubbly.   


“Hey,” Keith replied.

“How ya doing?” He asked. Keith chuckled.   


“Just as good as the last time you asked,” he replied.

“Well, I need to keep checking on you since you like to sulk sometimes,” Lance said. Keith rolled his eyes and looked down at their hands touching. It was normal for them to always be touching somehow.   


“You’re just looking for an excuse not to clean the tables,” he said looking up at him again.

“Do you _see_  any crumbs out there?” He sassed. Keith quickly glanced at the empty tables and shrugged.   


“I’m not wearing my glasses,” he replied. Lance playfully pushed his shoulder.

“You don’t even wear glasses, dummy,” he said. Keith chuckled and played with Lance’s sleeve.   


“Maybe I should.”

“Hey, Lance, could you check on table two? They’re getting a little rowdy,” Shiro asked. Lance nodded and immediately set his sights for the table in question. Keith watched him walk off and sighed.

“You’re very obvious,” Shiro said. Keith looked up at him with furrowed brows.   


“Huh?”

“Just so you know. We _all_  see it,” he told him.   


“See what?” Keith questioned. Shiro smiled and shook his head.

“I guess not all of us…but most of us see your ridiculous crush on Lance,” he said. Keith blushed loudly and shook his head.

“Shut up. We just live together, so we’re closer,” he mumbled.   


“Is that why you haven’t been able to take your eyes off him?”

“Shut up.”   


“I’m just saying-“

“Stoooooooop,” Keith groaned. Shiro chuckled.   


“Fine. Just make sure you’re still doing your job.

“Uh-huh.”   


    It took another month before Keith finally admitted he had a problem. The problem was his absolute infatuation with his new roommate and longtime coworker. He still refused to call it a crush, but he acknowledged that feelings were happening and it would eventually lead to disaster. The way he finally figured it out was kind of icky, but he had to figure it out one way or another.

    They had a snow day. Right smack in the middle of the week. It started snowing when Keith was on his way to work, and by the time he clocked out the ground was covered. He smiled at the footsteps leading through the town, and enjoyed the snowy winter scene. Apart of him wanted to play in it like he used to, but another part of him was satisfied with just reminiscing. Still, he couldn’t help but kick a couple times as he walked and smile wider as he watched it splatter out on the sidewalk.

“You’re home!” Lance said as Keith walked into their apartment. Keith laughed and nodded.   


“Yeah, and so are you,” he replied taking off his boots.

“Yeah, school got canceled. I’ve kinda just been _chilling_ out,” he grinned. Keith sighed and shook his head.

“Just when I think I can stand you, you pull this kinda shit.” Lance giggled from the couch.   


“You love me and you know it,” he replied. Keith rolled his eyes and shrugged off his jacket with his boots.

“You’re exposing my deepest darkest secrets,” Keith joked. Dramatic irony, anyone?   


“Are they really deep and dark when I could see them from a mile away?” Lance sassed. Keith shook his head again and sat on the other side of the couch.

“As if…”   


    It was in that moment when Lance plopped his feet into Keith’s lap did he realize the other man was in only his boxers and his nightshirt. Suddenly, Keith didn’t know what to do. It definitely wasn’t the first time Keith had seen Lance without pants, but this time was different. His _feet_ were in Keith’s _lap_ and he was just sitting there like all of it was completely normal. To be fair, it was pretty normal for them, but for some reason staring at the miles and miles of skin in front of him made Keith feel weak. He gently took Lance’s foot and started to rub his arch.

“Are you really giving me a foot massage right now?” He questioned raising his brow. Keith blushed and shrugged.

“Are you seriously questioning it? I’ve been to your school and you’re standing on fucking concrete all day,” he replied just as sassily. A smile spread across Lance’s face.   


“So you _do_  care,” he said. Keith bit his lip and kneaded his foot deeper. Lance let his eyes roll back and sighed.

    Keith swore that one time he jacked off thinking of Lance was the first and the last time he’d ever indulge in a fantasy like that. He still felt guilty about it nearly a month later, and he was adamant on never doing it again…but he’s only male. His eyes couldn’t help but take in the long tan limbs. The sound of his deep pleased breathing, and the way his body shifted to find a more confident position. The way he hummed with approval when Keith massaged him in a different way. His face when it was so relaxed and pleased. It was driving him crazy.

    All he could think about was touching more up his legs. Smoothing his palms over slim thighs and eventually boney hips as his lips worked against the supple skin. He couldn’t stop thinking about the way his body would tense up if he touched it like that, and then how it would fall apart and trembled as he kissed and laved his tongue against the inside of his legs. His eyes would dig into him as he undressed him, and would watched Keith as he got lost in the miles and miles of Lance’s skin. He wanted to kiss him, hold him, touch him, squeeze him, do anything to him to make him feel good. He couldn’t deny how much he wanted to be the source of Lance’s pleasure. His brain couldn’t help but imagine his cries.   


“Keith…Keith!”

“Keith?”   


    He blinked out of his fantasy and then looked over at his roommate. Lance looked like he was waiting for a response, so Keith cleared his throat. He let go of Lance’s first foot and then moved on to the other.

“Sorry, what?” He asked.   


“Do you have class tonight?” Lance repeated.

“Oh…” Keith pulled out his phone and checked the website to his university. “…nah, they canceled it.”   


“That’s nice,” Lance said with a smile. Keith smiled back and couldn’t help but blush a little.

“I guess we have the rest of the night to ourselves.”   


“I guess so. Have you ever had homemade hot chocolate?” Lance asked. Keith furrowed his brows.

“Uh…I don’t think so,” he answered. Lance moved his legs off of Keith’s lap and got up.

“Go get a bunch of Hershey’s bars from the lobby and I’ll start warming up the milk,” he told him. Keith watched him walk into the kitchen and pulling out the pot and the milk. He started pouring it out into the pot and looked back at Keith. 

“Are you gonna get the chocolate or not?”

“Oh, uh…yeah, I’ll go…do that.”   


    Keith wasn’t very good in the kitchen, so it was weird to see someone move so naturally in it. He went down to the lobby and got three chocolate bars from the vending machine. When he came back up, Lance was stirring the milk with a couple of spice jars next to him. He made grabby hands for the chocolate, and Keith smiled as he handed them to him.

“This was always my favorite part of snow days,” Lance said with a big smile. “Every time my mom would give me a couple dollars to walk to the store and get some chocolate for hot cocoa. It was so good.”

“Yeah?” Keith replied as he helped Lance unwrap the chocolate.   


“Yeah. My younger siblings would argue about who would come with me since my mom would only let a couple of us go at a time. I was special because I was the middle child.”

“You seem like a middle child.” Lance rolled his eyes.   


“Whatever…”

“Did you always use Hershey’s?” Lance shrugged.   


“Most of the times, yeah. Sometimes my mom had a little extra cash from work so she’d tell me to get the Ghirardelli instead,” he replied. His eyes started to drop and his smile faded as he broke up the chocolate and dropped it in the pot. Cinnamon sticks were already soaking in the warm milk.

“You okay?” Keith asked. Lance hesitated before nodding.   


“Yeah, I just…I miss my mom a lot sometimes. She was kinda my rock,” he explained. Keith nodded.

“Yeah…I can’t imagine how that feels,” Keith said and leaned against the counter. Lance shrugged.   


“Sometimes it’s easy. Sometimes it’s not. Most times I just try not to think about it.”

“I’m really sorry that happened to you,” Keith said. Lance bit his lip and then added the chili powder.   


“It’s no big deal,” he muttered and continued stirring. Keith frowned.

“Lance-“   


“Get out the mugs, why don’t ya?” Lance interrupted. Keith turned to grab their mugs from the cupboard and put them on the counter. Lance set down the wooden spoon and then opened the drawer with the ladle in it. He poured a cup for Keith and then poured some for himself. He then plastered a smile on his face and held up the warm mug.

“To snow days,” he said. Keith smiled and raised his glass to click with Lance’s.   


“To snow days,” he nodded.

    That night they stayed up late talking and hanging out. It was the longest Keith had to spend just focused on Lance, and when he was left along with the other man for too long he realized just how much he liked him. The sparkle in his eyes, and the cute little quirk to his smile. His hair and his freckles and the calluses on his hands. The way he talked with his hands and the way he blushed when he laughed too hard at a joke that totally wasn’t that funny. Soft smiles that melted Keith’s heart and made him want to pull him closer.   


“What do you want to do with your life?” Lance asked quietly. Keith blinked up at the ceiling and thought for a minute.

“I wanna make other people’s lives easier to deal with…I hate seeing people go through pain they don’t have to go through,” he said. Lance looked down at him from the couch and smiled.   


“That’s very noble of you,” he whispered. Keith’s eyes flicked over at him and he smiled.

“What about you?” He murmured. Lance sighed and ran his fingers through his hair.   


“I just wanna live…I want to be apart of someone’s routine. Get up. Drop off the kids. Get a haircut. Pick up the kids. Eat dinner,” he said. “Y’know…like a constant. I remember getting haircuts all the time when I was little, and I liked having that routine,” he answered. Keith nodded.

“That makes sense…” he hummed. Lance looked down at him again and smiled.

“I like having you as a constant. I didn’t think we’d be so close one day,” he said. Keith shrugged.   


“Stranger things have happened,” he replied. Lance chuckled and laid back on the couch.

“They sure have…”   


    The next day they had another snow day. Lance went into work with Keith since he was in town, and it was actually pretty busy since basically everyone had the day off. Still, Lance found the time to visit Keith at the shoe station and chat a little. It was in that moment when Lance came to his station again that he thought about how glad he was that Lance was a constant in his life too.


	6. Mad

“Okay.”

“Okay?”   


“I…might have a slight crush on Lance,” Keith finally admitted out loud. Shiro raised an eyebrow.

“A slight crush?”   


“Yes, and I don’t know what the fuck I’m doing,” he replied. Shiro laughed.

“There’s not much else to do besides tell him,” Shiro said. Keith rolled his eyes.   


“I’m not gonna do that he probably doesn’t even wanna deal with something like this. I mean I don’t know why I’m like letting this happen.”

“You say that like you can train your emotions like a dog,” Shiro said. Keith shrugged.   


“Feelings are just chemicals in the brain.”

“And pain is just electric currents shooting up in your brain. Just because it’s chemical doesn’t mean it’s not real,” he pointed out. Keith pouted and crossed his arms.   


“You’re not helping.”

“Just tell Lance how you feel. If you try to ignore it, it’ll just fester,” Shiro told him.   


“Like…that would be so awkward if he doesn’t feel the same. We like live together now,” he groaned. Shiro patted his back.

“There’s always a risk things will be awkward when you live with someone. If you hadn’t been in denial, you probably would’ve considered that,” Shiro said pointedly. Keith gave him a soft glare before sighing.

“Just…ugh.”   


“You should tell him.”

“Don’t wanna.”   


“Then stop complaining.”

“Don’t wanna.”   


“Then tell him.”

“Never.”   


“Keith-“

 

“Tell who what?”

    Keith fell out of his chair when Lance walked into the break room. He looked up at him with a red face and wide eyes, and Shiro couldn’t help laughing. Lance looked down at Keith with concern and then up at Shiro in confusion. He then offered his hand to help Keith up.

“Um…are you good?” Lance asked. Keith nodded.   


“Yeah…Yeah I’m good. I’m great. I’m…” falling in love with Lance faster than he fell out of his damn chair.

“You took a heck of a fall, dude. I didn’t mean to scare you,” Lance smiled. It was warm and it made Keith feel like a newly lit bonfire eating at anything given to it.

“I…Yeah…um…” he trailed off just looking at the other man. It was only when Shiro stood up and cleared his throat did he look away. Even then he belatedly realized he was still holding onto Lance’s hand.   


“I have some work to do, and you guys do too,” Shiro said before walking out of the break room. Keith nodded and let go of Lance’s hand.

“Right…”   


“What was all that about?” Lance asked.

“Nothing. We were just talking about something,” Keith said fixing his name tag and walking towards the exit.   


“I figured that much, but like _what?_ “ he reiterated.

“Uh…my paid time off,” he said walking out onto the floor. Lance followed.   


“Paid time off?”

“Yeah. Winter break is coming up and I need a week off to see family,” he replied.   


“Oh…you still see them?” Lance questioned.

“Yeah, I see my parents every winter and every summer,” Keith told him trying to walk faster. Lance merely caught up to him.   


“I thought you weren’t out to them,” he said. Keith nodded and walked into his shoe station.

“Yeah, they think I’m straight and single.” Lance walked around the other side and leaned on the counter like he always does.   


“Oh…are those both not true?” Lance asked timidly. Keith raised a brow.

“Trust me, if I had a boyfriend you’d know,” he said. Lance wrinkled his nose in discomfort.   


“Okay…”

“Still, they think I’m a straight virgin waiting for marriage like they raised me,” he answered. Lance furrowed his brows.

“Why would you want to go back to that every winter and every summer?” Lance questioned. Keith crosses his arms defensively. Was he really gonna get into a fight over a problem he made up?

“I have my reasons,” he said trying to restrain himself.   


“But like, doesn’t it make you uncomfortable?”

“Well yeah, of course-“   


“Then why bother going-“

“ _Look_ , just because _your_  parents don’t talk to you anymore doesn’t mean I’ll give up _mine_ ,” he snapped. Lance gaped at him, and Keith immediately wanted to eat his words. He sighed and ran his fingers through his hair. “Lance-“   


“Don’t fucking talk to me,” Lance growled before walking off to the break room. Keith clenched his jaw in frustration. Great.

    That night Lance got off before Keith did because he had the morning shift. When Keith got home it was dark in the apartment. He could see a soft light streaming out from under Lance’s bedroom, and set down his bag before walking over to knock on the door. There was no response, but he was expecting that. Instead of asking, he just opened the door and walked in. 

    Lance was laying in the middle of his floor watching his lava lamp on his dresser. His work uniform was basically thrown across the floor, and he wore his usual boxers and oversized night shirt. He hugged himself on the ground, and it was obvious that he had been crying before.   


“Hey,” Keith said. Lance sniffled and turned his head away. He sighed and closed the door behind him. “I’m really sorry, Lance,” he whispered as he crouched down. Lance licked his lips, they were dry from his sobbing.

“I didn’t ask for them to stop talking to me,” Lance said with a water voice.

“I know, and that wasn’t fair for me to say,” Keith replied. Lance sniffled some more and then dug his palms into his eyes.   


“I miss them,” he sobbed. Keith frowned and moved closer.

“I know you do.”   


“I-I was just…jealous that you can still talk to your parents,” Lance stammered.

“I should’ve figured that out on my own. I’m sorry I upset you,” He cooed. Lance tried to keep his lips together to keep in his sobs, but he couldn’t help but let a couple go.   


“I miss my mama…she always knew what to say and how to handle things. I miss my papa. He…h-he was always there to pick me up and cheer me on. All my younger siblings still live at home…I haven’t seen them in _months_.”

“Lance…” Keith felt a lump in his throat.   


“A-and I doubt I’ll ever see them again. If they ever ask about me, my parents wouldn’t have anything good to say about why they kicked me out. They’d just…lie…and they’d believe them and hate me for leaving,” he continued. 

    Keith took a heavy breath before leaning down and wrapping Lance in a hug. The other man was still for a moment before wrapping his arms around Keith’s neck and hugging him back. He cried into his shoulder, and Keith guided him upright until they were properly embracing. Lance clung to him tighter and cried harder as Keith rubbed comforting circles into his back.   


“I’m sorry, Lance. I really am.”

“Y-you didn’t…I mean…it was only fair because…I wasn’t…” he dissolved into a puddle of tears.   


“Shh…just…calm down, okay? Breathe before you speak,” Keith murmured. Lance took a couple deep breaths before attempting to talk again.

“I’m sorry I pushed you. You wouldn’t have snapped if I hadn’t been so rude, and I had no right to ask you that,” he said. Keith was silent for a moment.

“I’ll accept your apology if you accept mine,” he said. Lance sighed before nodding.   


“Okay…sounds fair,” he sniffled. Keith pulled back and smiled.

“Why don’t we microwave some popcorn and watch something on Hulu. I think I found a show you’d really enjoy,” he suggested. Lance smiled before nodding.   


“I’d like that…”

    Keith watched Lance fall asleep against his chest that night. His body clearly exhausted from all the emotions and the hormones running through it. He slept peacefully, curled up and warm underneath the blanket they shared, and Keith had a perfect view, propped up on the pillow. Fingers ran through brown hair without a second thought, and he let out a deep breath before slowly letting his own eyes slid shut.   


    At this point it, wasn’t just a crush. Keith knew it was always more than just a crush, but at this point, Lance was so intertwined with his life that he couldn’t imagine it without the other man in it. He held onto each previous memory they shared, and craved to make new ones with him. His mind was filled with daydreams of what they’d do when he got home, and when he was home, all he could think about was how wonderful Lance was. The person he once dreaded to see at work was suddenly the only person he wanted to spend his time with. Maybe it had something to do with his transition, and maybe it was something to do with how much Lance barged into his life unannounced. Either way, all Keith knew was that he was dangerously close to falling in love with him.

“Hey…Keith…wake up.”   


    Keith groaned and held Lance tighter. He didn’t know what day it was and he couldn’t bring himself to care. Instead, he buried his nose in Lance’s hair and settled deeper into the couch.

“Seriously…we need to get up,” Lance muffled against Keith’s chest.   


“Five more minutes,” Keith muttered. Lance managed to wiggle out of his arms, and Keith frowned at the lack of weight over him. “Mmm…”

“I have school, and you have work,” Lance told him. Keith laid on his back and sighed.   


“Why did we stay up so late?” He groaned. Lance chuckled and sat back on his hips.

“Because the show was too good, and I wanted to see the Jack Black episode,” Lance said. Keith finally opened his eyes and blinked up at the other man.   


    He looked ethereal. The way the morning light shone through the blinds and covered his body was beautiful, and his blue eyes so lidded with sleep. The view Keith had looking up at him was the best he’s had since he started living with him. He couldn’t help but slid a hand onto his knee. Lance merely smiled and fell back on top of Keith. The other man welcome him with open arms and ran his fingers down his spine.

“We really should get up,” Lance hummed.   


“You’re the one who came back down,” Keith reminded him. Lance groaned and Keith chuckled. He then pushed himself up again. He pointed at Keith.

“Work,” he pointed at himself. “School. Let’s go,” he said. Keith pouted, and Lance rolled his eyes before hopping off and making his way to the kitchen.

“Bacon? Pancakes? I have sometime before I need to get on the bus,” he offered. Keith rolled over to watch Lance from the couch.   


“What time is it?” He yawned.

“Like almost nine,” He said.

“It’s still early. I don’t work till noon,” Keith grumbled and rested his forehead on the armrest.   


“And if we woke up at ten, you wouldn’t be able to have pancakes,” Lance hummed and grabbed the flour and sugar.

“You’re a goddamn menace in the mornings,” Keith mumbled. Lance laughed.

“I forgot I was dealing with the nocturn—al-“ Lance clapped his hand over his mouth when his voice broke, and immediately heard Keith cackling on the couch. “Stop laughing! This isn’t fair!”

“Oh my god… _how_ is this the _first_ _time_ I’ve heard your voice crack?” He wheezed. Lance pouted and crossed his arms.   


“Staaaahp, oh my god.”

“Nocturn- _al_ , haha!”   


“Stop or I won’t make you any breakfast,” he warned. Keith gave one last chuckle before getting up and walking into the kitchen.

“Okay okay, I’m sorry,” he hummed. Lance merely smiled and got out the bacon. Sometimes it was just too hard to stay mad at him.


	7. days

    Keith sat awkwardly at his parents dinner table. It was Christmas Eve, and they always had ham together with twice baked potatoes and cider. They had veggies for the side, and cobbler for dessert. Nothing ever changed, and every year was always the same. Each time they’d ask if he was seeing anyone, and Keith would say he’s been casually dating and talking to girls on campus, but was too focused on studying to put more effort into it. They accepted that answer every year.

    This year felt a little different. The air was stiff with tension, and Keith couldn’t help but feel like he was being picked apart, piece by piece by his parents. They watched his every move and bit their tongues like they had something to say, but remained silent for almost the entire dinner. Keith didn’t want to say anything, so he kept to himself. Then his father put down his fork and cleared his throat. Keith gave him his full attention.

“Keith…how many years of school do you have left?” He asked. Keith thought for a second.   


“I’ll have my bachelors after my summer term, but I may shoot for my masters,” he replied.

“That’s wonderful,” his mother said. His father gave her a look and she resumed eating her potatoes.   


“Yes, I agree with your mother, but…we’re really concerned with your future,” he said. Keith furrowed his brows and slowed his chewing before swallowing.

“My…future? That’s why I’m going to school,” he said. His mother nodded.   


“Yes, and we are so proud of you for that.”

“Irene…” his father said sternly. She nodded again and allowed him to continue.   


“I mean, family-wise. It’s been almost four years and you haven’t even gotten a girlfriend,” he said. Keith felt himself turn pale.

“Uh…”   


“I don’t like to put pressure on you, but…we wish we could’ve had you and a biological child. Of course we’d love you equally, but there’s something about having a direct descendant that’s special,” he said. Keith felt that in his gut.

“Oh.”   


“We love you so much, honey. We think Stephanie would be a great match for you. If not, Sarah has always had an eye for you,” his mother piped in again.

“Lets no overwhelm him, Irene,” his father said gently.   


“I…uh…I have a girlfriend actually,” he lied. His parents paused for a moment. He turned bright red as they stared at him.

“You do?” His mother asked. He could hear the excitement in her voice. Keith nodded stiffly.   


“Yeah…yeah, we’ve been dating for like…a few months now,” he said.

“That’s wonderful. What’s her name?” His father asked.   


“Her name? Uh…her name is…Lacey,” he mentally smacked himself.

“Lacey. That’s such a lovely name,” his mother sighed.   


“Do you have a picture of her? I’d love to meet her. You should bring her next year.”

“Uh, she’s like really shy. She doesn’t even have social media,” he said.   


“How modest. It’s nice you found someone who doesn’t waste their time on their phone all day. It wouldn’t be healthy when you have a child,” his mother said. Keith swallowed hard and shoved more food in his mouth.

“What is she doing? School wise?” His father asked. Keith was filled with regret as he word vomited everywhere.   


“She’s studying to be a hairdresser,” he said.

“Oh,” his father said.   


“That’s a good career to have. I know lots of my friends who go to the salon for their weekly curls,” his mother added.

“Yeah, she’s…she’s really good at it.”   


“That’s really great, son,” his father smiled. It was the warmest he has been towards Keith ever since he moved out.

“Yes, we’re really happy for you. Aren’t we, Howard?” Irene smiled. Howard nodded.   


“Yes. Extremely.” Keith laughed nervously.

“Yeah…me too.”   


    When Keith got home that weekend, all he could do was sit and simmer. His spring term didn’t start for another month, and he was dying for a distraction. Usually, that distraction was watching pointless shows and drowning in microwaveable popcorn. He could barely bring himself to talk with Lance, and he could tell it made the other man upset. At least he had something to do to distract him from it.

    It was two weeks later when Keith finally broke down. He spent the entire day in bed as he let tears roll over his nose bridge. The conversation he had at Christmas Eve dinner played and played again in his head and he eventually hated himself for letting it go on for so long. He only got up to shower, and he only showered to feel the water run down his body and wash away the filth he felt every time he went home. He was disgusted with himself for lying, but desperate to feel more of his parents approval and warmth that he missed so much.

    When Keith got out of the shower and dressed himself Lance finally came home. Keith wanted nothing more but to crawl into bed with the other man and hold on to him. Anything to make the pain go away. He knew he couldn’t possibly feel this way if he had Lance, and apart of him was distressed that he relied on Lance so much to be happy.

   Lance hopped into the shower, and Keith waited until he was all done and dressed. After he was positive Lance was covered, Keith knocked on his door, and Lance called for him to come in. He entered the room and Lance sat on his bed. He looked reserved. As if Keith was gonna say something mean.

“Are you done avoiding me now?” He asked.    


    Keith blinked and felt himself start to cry again. Lance lost his glare as he realized the sincerity of Keith’s emotions, and got up to lead him to bed. Keith immediately wrapped his arms around Lance and silently held him. Skinny fingers smoother through Keith’s hair, and he closed his tired eyes as Lance petted him and caressed his cheeks.

“What’s wrong?” He asked.   


“I lied to them,” Keith whispered.

“Your parents?” He nodded. “What about?”   


“I told them I have a girlfriend,” he murmured. Lance frowned.

“What did they say?” Keith took a sharp inhale before answering.   


“It was the happiest they’ve been with me for years,” his voice trembled. Lance sighed and hugged Keith’s head against his chest.

“That’s really shit.”   


“I’m the one who’s shit.”

“No…”   


“I am. I…I gave them your dead name. It was the first thing I could think of,” Keith sighed. Lance hummed and pulled his hair from his mouth.

“It’s…it’s okay. I understand. I don't really think of that name belonging to me,” he murmured. Keith let his tears soak into Lance’s teeshirt, and took another shaky breath.   


“They talked about…having a child…bringing her to dinner next year…starting a family…” he sniffled. “I can’t do any of that, and…a-and I hate that I can’t.”

“Maybe not naturally. Maybe not in a way that your parents would like, but…you’re more than capable of starting a family. Anyone can,” Lance assured him.

“I dunno if I even want to. I just…I’m trying to just study and graduate. Maybe get my masters. I just…I-I can’t see it for the next couple of years.”   


“And that makes sense.” Keith stuttered his breath.

“I just wish I was enough for them. I wish I didn’t have to lie to make them happy. I wish they loved me for me,” his voice broke the longer he went on. Lance nodded against the top of his head.

“They don’t know the real you, okay? It’s hard. Feeling that rejection from your parents…it’s awful. I don’t blame you for not telling them,” Lance whispered. Keith moved his head up to nuzzle Lance’s neck.   


“Sorry I avoided you,” he murmured. Lance moved his arms to wrap under Keith’s armpits.

“It’s okay. We all cope differently.”   


“You’re so good with this emotional crap,” Keith grumbled. Lance chuckled and rubbed his back.

“I’m just sensitive.”   


“Yeah, you’re kind of a baby.”

“I kind of really take offense to that.”   


“I’m sure you do.” Lance laughed and nuzzled back.

“Eat shit, Keith.”

    Once again, they fell asleep in each other’s arms. Keith was the one to wake up first that time, and he spent that time before Lance woke up to watch him. Sure it could be considered creepy, but he just couldn’t resist studying his peaceful expression while he was completely unaware of what Keith was doing. Lance snored lightly every so often, and Keith smiled whenever he did. Sometimes he flinched, and sometimes he moved closer to Keith when he noticed he moved away to watch. Eventually Keith let Lance hold onto him and snuggle against his chest. It was then that Keith decided this was ten times better than the warmth he got from his father during Christmas dinner.

    Soon enough, Lance’s alarm went off. He groaned against Keith’s chest, and eventually pushed himself up to reach over the other man and turn it off. He then flopped over Keith and slowly rubbed his forehead against Keith’s arm. The other man chuckled and reached up to massage his nape.

“Ooooooooh fuck yeah,” he sighed. Keith smirked and used the arm Lance was leaning on to pull him closer. “I needa wake up…”   


“Call in,” Keith tempted. Lance groaned and shook his head.

“I can’t…I’m…I need the hours.   


“I got you, okay? Just take the day with me,” he hummed. Lance pushed himself up and pouted. “Seriously, I’ve had fuck all to do during this break. I’ve already worked over time last week and the week before. Lance pursed his lips.

“I almost feel like you’re paying me to hangout with you,” Lance said. Keith smirked.   


“Maybe. I dunno. I like being alone, but I can’t be alone after what my parents said,” he said truthfully. Lance frowned and then sighed.

“I guess that’s a good enough reason. You owe me ninety bucks,” he said. Keith grinned and pulled Lance back into bed with him.   


“Deal.”

    They spent the day half in bed and half in the kitchen. Keith found that he loved to watch Lance make his way through the cupboards and make them something absolutely delicious to eat. They went to the grocery store in the middle of the day and grabbed some ingredients Lance wanted to make a recipe he remembered from home. Keith paid for all of it since he owed Lance for taking the day off, and decided it was worth it while he was watching Lance prepare their food.

“You always make so much,” Keith notes from the counter.   


“Leftovers! Makes bringing lunches easier,” he said. Keith smiled. Of course.

“That’s pretty smart.”

“I can be smart sometimes,” he said with a grin. 

    Keith let his eyes fall down Lance’s body and found himself indulging in an entirely different fantasy. Waking up in the morning and smelling eggs on the stove. Pulling himself out of bed to see Lance already up and preparing breakfast. Coming up behind him and wrapping his arms around his waist. Greeting him with kisses over his neck. Running his lips over the spots he had left the previous nights, and smiling sleepily when his lover shivered at his warm breath. Still a dirty fantasy, but in a warm and playful way. If only he had the confidence to actually do that.

“This has to bake for a while, and we can get started on the flan in the meantime. It should be done by the time we’re ready to put the flan in,” Lance said. Keith snapped out of his daydream.

“We?” He questioned. Lance laughed.   


“Yeah, you have to do _something_  eventually,” Lance teased. Keith blushed and smiled nervously.

“I dunno…I’ve never really been good at cooking,” he said.   


“That’s why I’m here to lead,” Lance said and waved for Keith to come over. Keith did so and watched Lance put the pan into the oven.

“What is flan?” He asked.   


“It’s kinda like pudding, but not,” Lance answered.

“That makes perfect sense,” Keith said sarcastically. Lance rolled his eyes. Keith imagined kissing him in response.

“Just shut up and hand me that whisk.”


	8. Love

    Keith thought about kissing Lance a lot. Sometimes he would just watch his mouth as he talked and imagined leaning in and shutting him up when he rambled for too long. He pictured how soft his lips would be, and how gentle his breath would be when he pulled back. He craved whispering sighs and quivering moans as he kissed him harder and trailed down his neck. Not only sexually, but sweetly. Holding him closer and pouring his heart out to the other man through his body. He was never really good at words anyways. Only when he needed to be.

    To his knowledge, Lance was still oblivious to Keith’s gigantic pathetic and hopeless crush on him. It drove him crazy when Lance just casually came into his room and laid on his bed. He wanted nothing more but to just tackle him on sight and go to fucking town when he was in his boxers and teeshirt. Usually, he was freshly showered too, and the scent of his shampoo was like an instant dopamine kick. It didn’t help that Lance would just lay his head on Keith’s shoulder while he studied. It was like he was _trying_ to torture Keith. He still wouldn’t tell.

    To be fair, they basically did everything like a couple anyways. They shopped together, hung out together, cuddled, snuggled, watched their favorite shows together, argued about stupid shit, and cheered each other up when they were down. The only thing that was missing was soft kisses and getting tangled in the sheets. Keith wasn’t one to complain, but his body practically buzzed when Lance was close to him. He was _dying_ to put his hands on the other man.   


    Despite his sexual frustration and lust for Lance as a human being, he often pondered what that would be like. Obviously it wouldn’t be like any other experience Keith has had with a man, but he also worried about Lance’s comfort. He was prepared for Lance to feel completely uncomfortable without his shirt, and marginally less without his boxers, but he wondered if Lance even wanted to go that far. Sure, he figured he wasn’t the only one in the world with blue balls. Lance was probably suffering with it constantly now that he’s been on testosterone for so long. That didn’t mean he wanted to put himself out there to relieve it. All Keith wanted to be the source of his pleasure. God knows Lance was the source of his.

    A box with a note on top waited for Keith in the break room fridge. He recognized the container and picked it up to read the note Lance had left him. A smile spread across his face. He knew Keith always forgets his lunch, so he left an extra container in the fridge for him. The end of the note was signed off with a big smiley face, and it made Keith’s heart melt and spill over. Of course he would do that.

“What’s that?” Shiro asked. Keith handed him the note and continued to smile as he walked to the microwave. “Oh. That’s very sweet.” Keith leaned on the counter as he watched his food heat up.

“Yeah. Very sweet,” he sighed, still grinning. Shiro smiled and set the paper down on the counter.   


“I’m glad you’re happy, Keith,” he said. Keith didn’t let that annoy him and simply focused on the food Lance had made the other night.

“Thanks…”   


    That night when Keith got home from school, he noticed that Lance wasn’t passed out on the couch like he usually was. Keith took off his jacket and shoes at the door and then went to his room to set down his backpack. When he came back out he heard sniffling from Lance’s bedroom. It was opened a crack, and dark. The only light that came out was from his lava lamp, but even then it wasn’t very bright. Keith curiously knocked on the door and walked in to see Lance wiping away his snot and tears.

“Hey,” he said softly.   


“Hey,” Lance replied, rubbing at his eyes.

“Everything alright?” He asked. Lance nodded and wiped another tear.   


“Yeah…Yeah, I’m just…” he trailed off and shrugged. “I’m just here.” Keith frowned.

“Uh…Okay?” Keith stepped further into his room. “Can I sit?” He asked pointing to the spot next to Lance. The other man nodded.   


“Yeah…Yeah, go ahead.”

“Thanks.”   


“No problem.” They sat in silence for a minute, and Keith could tell Lance was practically forcing himself not to cry.

“Seriously, Lance. What’s going on?” He asked. Lance sighed.   


“Did you get the lunch I left for you?” Lance changed the subject.

“Stop that, and tell me what’s up,” Keith said sternly. Lance sighed and let out a sob.   


“My insurance doesn’t cover top surgery…” he whispered, pulling his knees up to his chest. Keith felt a squeeze on his heart. He knew how much Lance needed that. “I just got off the phone with my siblings and…they went to the gender pathways clinic and asked about insurance under our names, and it only covered the hormones.”

“Lance…”   


“I-I’ll never be able to get that much money…I’m already working as much as I can and I’m only barely able to save twenty dollars a month. Even then, it covers emergencies. I-I’m never gonna be able to just…fucking get rid of it. I’m gonna have to bind for the rest of my life, and my body will always be this thing that doesn’t feel right and my ribs and lungs hurt from wearing my binder too long, but I can’t help it! It just feels so wrong not wearing it, a-a-and I’m at school for so long, and I’m so fucking moody and horny and my fucking dick hurts all the fucking time and I’m turning into a greasy fucking teenager again!” He rambled. Keith blinked.

“Wow, Okay. Uh…let’s tackle this one at a time, okay?” He suggested. Lance took a deep breath and then nodded.

“Okay.”

“So, top surgery and saving money,” Keith started.   


“I’ll never be able to afford that. It’s like ten thousand dollars. That’s like not even considering that it’s like a six week healing process,” Lance said.

“Well, Lance you’re in school right now. You’ve got really strict hours too, and the jobs you’re working are all minimum wage jobs. You’re learning a trade, and it’ll take some time for you to get licensed and making a living,” Keith told him. “Once you get into a salon you like and start building a clientele, it’ll be easier to save. Trust me, after you put those eight hours towards a paycheck, it’ll be so much easier to save.” Lance sniffled.

“I guess…I didn’t even think about that because I work so much I forget what pays and what doesn’t.”   


“I swear, if I had to be at school for eight hours a day I wouldn’t be working full time. I’ll always be here if you need support,” Keith said. Lance looked up at him.

“Yeah?”   


“Yeah. Whatever you need to prepare and recover. I’ll be there,” he promised. Lance furrowed his brows.

“You…you’d help me with recovery?” He asked. Keith nodded.   


“Of course I would.” Maybe it was from Lance’s lava lamp, but Keith could’ve sworn he was blushing.

“Wow…I…thank you.”   


“I mean, unless you move out, I wouldn’t have much of a choice,” he teased. Lance smiled.

“Me? Move out? No way. You know too much about me,” he played along. They laughed together and Lance moved closer.   


“You should probably set a timer on your phone when you put on your binder, Okay? Maybe pack a sports bra when you go to school too,” Keith suggested. Lance sighed and nodded.

“I really should,” he agreed and then pulled out his phone to do so. “Thank you.”   


“Yeah, I mean…I don’t know a lot about binders, but I know it’s not a good thing to leave them on too long,” Keith replied. Lance nodded.

“Yeah. It could make top surgery harder for the surgeon.”   


“Yeah that doesn’t sound good,” Keith nodded. Lance set down his phone and sighed as they sat in more silence. Keith then nudged him. “I did get the lunch you left me, by the way.” Lance smiled.

“I’m glad. You’re really bad at packing them, and then you waste your money on the shitty bowling alley chicken strips,” Lance said. Keith chuckled.   


“And you say _I_ know too much,” he teased. Lance laughed and then cleared his throat.

“Can we like…please talk about my dick now? I’m actually kind of worried about it,” he said. Keith nodded and furrowed his brows.   


“Yeah, I mean…I’m not sure if you mean…like what…”

“Testosterone makes…uh…it makes the clitoris grow. It basically acts like a little penis.”   


“ _Oh_. Okay. So…what’s wrong again?”

“It just…it was like the first change I had within like a month, but it acts up sometimes and it’s like it’s just sore? And I’m just so tired of being turned on by anything and everything,” he said. He then sighed and shook his head. “I dunno…maybe I’m not cut out for this. Like…maybe this was all a mistake and I should’ve never even started transitioning. Maybe I’m just gonna be a fucking freak for the rest of my life.”   


“Whoa, Lance, that's like, crazy,” Keith said. Lance looked at him and frowned.

“Is it?”   


“ _Yeah_ , dude. What the fuck?” He couldn’t help but chuckle. Lance rested his frown between his knees. “Sorry, I didn’t mean to laugh.”

“I mean…I’m just confused. I think I rushed into this.”   


“Lance, not everything about being a guy is fun,” Keith told him. Lance furrowed his brows. “Like…I can see the difference for you, and honestly this is pretty normal for a guy. I was _super_ horny during puberty and it was beyond frustrating, but you don’t see me taking estrogen just because it was a shitty part of being a guy,” Keith explained. Lance looked down in thought.

“Oh…”   


“I’m pretty sure you didn’t start transitioning because you wanted a sore dick and the sexual frustration of a fourteen year old,” Keith said. Lance was now the one to crack a smile.

“I dunno. It crossed my mind,” he hummed.   


“And you decided it was worth it,” Keith said with a smile. Lance nodded.

“Yeah…” Keith rubbed his shoulder.   


“You got this, okay?” Lance sniffled again and put his legs down to hug him.

“Okay…”   


“You should get some sleep,” Keith said pulling back. Lance nodded and watched him get up and walk away. He made it to the doorway before Lance spoke up again.

“Do you…can you stay here tonight?” He asked. Keith turned back and stared at the other man on the edge of his bed. Keith nodded and walked back.   


“Yeah, of course.” Lance smiled and then got up too.

“I have to change. Um…I’m still wearing my binder,” he said. Keith nodded.   


“Yeah, I should probably get into my pyjamas,” he agreed. Lance giggled and shook his head.

“You sleep in your boxers just like me,” he pointed out. Keith crawled into the bed and smirked.   


“I didn’t know you slept in my boxers,” he replied pulling down his jeans. Lance rolled his eyes and shook his head.

“Um…do you mind not looking?” He requested softly.    


    Keith nodded and covered his eyes as he laid down. Lance then quickly removed his pants as well and pulled off his teeshirt. He then wiggled out of his binder and pulled out his dresser drawer to find a tight sports bra. After he was all dressed and in his sleep shirt, he plugged in his phone and then crawled into bed with Keith. The other man groaned in pain when Lance shoved his knee into his stomach, and Lance merely laughed.

“You fucking prick!” Keith said with a bubbly laugh. Lance giggled and nudged his hip with his foot. “Alright, you really wanna do this?” He challenged pushing himself up with his forearm. Lance smiled deviously up at him.   


“Bite me,” he teased.

    It took five minutes for Keith to pin Lance to the bed. He definitely put up a fight, and they still continued to wrestle even after Keith pinned him. The room was filled with Lance’s squeaky mattress and their giggles as Keith started to tickle him. Lance’s laughter rang through the room and Keith couldn’t help but savor the sound. They eventually settled down and Keith was still on top gazing down at the other man. Lance bit his lip and then smiled wider. Keith reached down to caress his face, and Lance pushed his chin up to tempt his pale fingers further.   


“You didn’t bite me,” Lance murmured. Keith pulled his hand away to hold himself up as he towered over him.

“Do you really want me to?” Keith hummed and tilted his head to the side. Lance bit his lip and touched down Keith’s arms.   


“Yeah…Yeah, I really do,” Lance whispered.

    It was the last thing Keith thought he would ever do, but he couldn’t bare to say no when Lance was so blatantly asking for him. He leaned down and slowly brushed his lips against Lance’s. His only response was a timid flinch when Keith cupped his face, but he easily fell into the kiss as Keith pressed in. It was like all of his tension and stress was relieved in one simple touch, and Lance was the missing piece. His lips were just as soft as he imagined, and his hands shaking against him as he touched up his arms. 

    Keith couldn’t help indulging in a second kiss, and loved the way Lance wrapped his arms around his neck. When he finally found the strength to pull back, he let out a heavy breath against Lance’s lips, and rubbed his thumb against his cheek. Just as he was thinking about how hopelessly in love he was with the other man, Lance whispered against his lips.   


“God, I’m gonna fall for you one of these days.”


	9. Right

    Keith was convinced last night was some kind of dream. He woke up alone in Lance’s bed, and tried to distinguish the kiss they shared between reality and his dreams. When he sat up, he decided it was the latter and pulled himself out of bed. His body was stiff, but it always was when he spent the night with Lance. He had a bad habit of staying still to keep Lance as comfortable as possible, and when he got up that resulted in a minor ache in his arms.

    Walking into the kitchen felt a little different. There was a bowl on top of the pan Lance usually cooked his breakfast with and a note of top of the bowl. Keith picked it up and skimmed it with furrowed brows.   


“Good morning, I had to leave extra early to put in more hours for school. I’ll see you tonight when you get home, but until then, I hope you have a good day. I made extra eggs for you…” Keith looked at the bowl after he read the note and put it down to pick up the bowl. Surely enough a pile of warm eggs sat underneath. Keith couldn’t help but smile a little. “…ah…”

    That day Keith couldn’t help but feel a little confused. They only shared a couple kisses last night before passing out in each other’s arms. He remembered feeling Lance kiss the top of his head and stroke his hair until he fell asleep, but he wasn’t sure if he was imagining that or not. He also remembered gently kissing the other man’s neck and nuzzling against him. The memories felt like a dream come true, and he couldn’t help but feel skeptical. What if he imagined all of it? What if he was just playing out a fantasy in his memories? It was pretty late when he got home, and he was already pretty tired.   


    Everything going through his mind resulted in Keith being distracted at work. He tried his best to be mentally present, but he couldn’t help but ponder it and stress over it. Should he pretend nothing happened? Should he kiss him again? Does Lance remember either? Does he even really feel the same way? Was he just tired last night? Questions and thoughts raced through his mind as he robotically put shoes away and handed out new ones. Usually he’d try to converse, but he couldn’t muster the brain power. Finally, Shiro took notice.

“Hey, how’s it going?” His manager asked. Keith looked up at him and nodded.   


“It’s going good,” he replied.

“Really? You seem kind of distracted,” he noticed. Keith swallowed hard and ran his fingers through his hair. He furrowed his brows.   


“I think I kissed Lance last night? But…I can’t remember if it actually happened or if I was just dreaming?” He said. Shiro’s brows shot up and he nodded.

“Okay. Yeah, that can be distracting.”   


“I’m like…kinda confused. He made me eggs this morning before he left for school,” he said. Shiro smiled.

“That was very nice of him.”   


“Yeah…still doesn’t tell me if we made out or not, but still very nice,” Keith murmured. Shiro chuckled.

“Based on how you guys interact, I wouldn’t be surprised if it actually happened,” Shiro said. Keith bit his lip.   


“I dunno…”

“Trust me. He’s kinda into you,” he winked. Keith blushed and looked down.   


“Yeah, totally,” he replied sarcastically.

“I’m sure you don’t see it, but everyone else does. Hunk and Coran are betting on who’s gonna ask out who first,” Shiro told him. Keith rolled his eyes and shook his head.

“Not gonna happen,” he said.   


“Totally,” Shiro said with a knowing smile.

“Don’t you have like employees to manage?” Shiro chuckled.   


“Alright. I’ll leave you alone for now.”

“Thanks…”   


    Keith didn’t have any classes that night, so he spent his time practically waiting for Lance to get home. He watched a couple movies, made some popcorn, finished up some of his homework, and showered all before Lance came in. He was drying off his hair after he got dressed when he heard the door open, and leaned against his door frame when Lance walked in. The other man looked absolutely beat and dropped his stuff before stumbling to the couch. Keith smiled.

“Welcome home,” he said.   


“I hate extended hours,” Lance sighed. Keith chuckled and tossed his towel back into his room. He then came over to the couch and stood next to it with his arms crossed.

“Long day?” He asked. Lance nodded.   


“Twelve hours,” he croaked.

“Jesus Christ,” Keith replied furrowing his brows. Lance nodded again and managed to prop himself up to look up at Keith. He then patted the couch and reached for him.   


“C’mere,” he pouted. 

    Keith smiled before he crawled onto the couch. Lance pulled him between his legs and leaned back down holding his head to his chest. Keith wrapped his arms around his waist, and let himself indulge in the lack of space. Thin fingers played with his wet hair, and Keith rubbed his cheek against the flat surface of Lance’s chest. He then paused and pulled back with a concerned look on his face.   


“How long have you been wearing your binder?” He asked. Lance smiled sheepishly and looked away.

“Uh…all day,” he admitted. Keith sighed and got up. “Wait, no—“ he stopped talking as Keith tugged him up and dragged him to his bed room. He watched as Keith opened his dresser and grabbed one of his sports bras. The other man then held the garment to his chest.

“Change,” he ordered before leaving Lance to his privacy.    


    A smile spread across his face before he did as Keith said. He pulled his sleep shirt over his head and took off his pants before walking out into their living room again. Keith was checking his phone on the couch, and Lance tip toed his way next to him. He didn’t look up as Lance sat down, and he didn’t try to stop him as Lance wedged his way under his arms and against his chest. Instead all he did was rub Lance’s back and resume his scrolling.

“What’s on the gram today?” Lance asked.   


“I’m not even on ‘the gram’,” Keith replied dryly. Lance giggled and let his hand come up on his chest. Keith then turned his phone off and tossed it on their ottoman. “How was school?” He asked, pushing his brown locks out of place. Lance shook his head trying to shake off Keith’s hand, but that only messed his hair up more.  


“Long. I got a lot of tips though. Some lady gave me like three dollars and told me to get myself a coffee,” he said. Keith chuckled.

“All the good coffee is like four bucks,” he said. Lance laughed with him.   


“That’s what I was thinking.”

“Did you get anything you liked?”   


“Yeah, I did a couple of fun haircuts. I had a lot of facials today, and those ones tip the most,” he went on.

“That’s good…” Keith nodded.   


“Did you like the eggs I made you?”

“You know I did.”   


“Were they still warm when you woke up?”

“Yup. Perfect like always,” Keith said. Lance rubbed his thumb against Keith’s chest, and Keith ran his fingers down Lance’s back. The tan man then sat himself up to look Keith in the eyes.

“I missed you today,” he murmured. Keith reached up and caressed his jaw.   


“I missed you too,” he smirked. Lance smiled back and leaned closer.

“I miss you everyday,” he whispered. Keith felt a his heart squeeze.

“Yeah, I…I miss you a lot,” Keith said as Lance got closer. 

    His hand moved up Keith’s chest, and he turned his head slightly. Keith did the same and touched further up his back to push him closer. When their lips met, Lance touched his cheek and practically melted against him. Keith held him around his waist, and Lance had to hold on to his arm to stay stable. The warmth his body offered made Keith feel hazy, and the gentle press of each kiss Lance gave him only tempted him further into it. He used his other hand to touch down his arm and over his elbow. His skin so soft and his body so close. It was just as wonderful as he imagined, and so much more addicting than he could’ve predicted.

    Lance pulled back, and Keith could only look at him with lidded eyes. He smiled wide and rubbed his thumb against Keith’s lower lip. Keith looked down as Lance pressed their foreheads together and kissed him again briefly.   


“I missed that,” he hummed. Keith managed to think clearly enough to smile.

“So that did really happen last night,” he mumbled. Lance laughed and nodded.

“Yes, that really happened last night,” Lance confirmed. Keith smiled before kissing him again.   


“Thank god,” he sighed between kisses.

    Lance accepted his lips and wrapped his arms around Keith’s neck. He quickly found his way on Keith’s lap and feathered cute little kisses down his neck and over his jaw. Keith welcomed his warmth and affection and let his head roll back as Lance pressed himself closer against the other man. His hands gently grabbing the front of Keith’s shirt and smoothing down his chest. Keith then cupped his nape and guided their lips together again. Lance kissed him back, and Keith gently prodded his tongue against the seam of his lips.   


    When Lance opened his mouth to Keith, he felt light headed at the stimulation Keith provided. He let the other man hold him and guide him in a way that made Lance feel absolute bliss. It wasn’t exactly heated, but it was definitely more intense and made Lance’s mind slip away.

   He wanted more, and he made that very clear to Keith as he pulled away and tugged him with him. Keith watched with cloudy eyes as Lance got off him and laid back. He pulled him between his legs again, and Keith crawled on top of him with no questions asked. Lips drifted down his neck, and Lance eased his arms around Keith’s neck again. The way his lips pressed against his skin made him buzz with pleasure, and he let his eyes close as Keith wedged his arm between Lance’s back and the couch.

“This is fun,” Lance sighed. Keith chuckled under his ear and Lance shivered at the sensation.   


“Yeah, fun is one word for it,” he agreed and rubbed the tip of his nose against Lance’s pulse.

“What’s another word for it?” Lance asked quietly. Keith pushed himself up to look down at Lance and smiled widely.   


“It’s right,” he murmured. Lance smiled back and held Keith’s face in his hands.

“I couldn’t agree more.”


	10. Perfect

    It wasn’t something they really talked about. Between being overly busy with work and school as well as having a lack of labels in the first place, whatever they were never really came up in conversation. Label or no label, being able to come home and kiss Lance on the couch was the most amazing feeling in the world. It was the one thing he held onto when his class felt useless or the customers were assholes. Just knowing that he could be holding the person he adores the most within the next couple hours kept him going. He only hoped Lance felt the same.

    Everything all went on for a month without acknowledgment. The soft kisses and sweet touches were satisfying, and Keith loved how much closer he was to the other man. Each day his heart was fuller than the other. They spent every night with each other. Whoever got home first hosted, but eventually they mostly settled on Keith’s bed. The only time they used Lance’s room was when he was having a rough time with things and couldn’t leave his bed. Keith would shove his way in and hold him tight until he passed out from exhaustion. He only hated it because he wished Lance could feel okay.   


    There was no sex between them. Keith didn’t try to push it, and was glad Lance even wanted to kiss him. He knew it was probably a sensitive issue, so it wasn’t something he worried about. The only downside to that was when kissing lead to making out and then making out lead to Keith pinning Lance down and sucking hickeys down his chest. To be fair that only happened when Lance egged him on too much and practically begged for the other man to ravish him. But Keith would never blame it on Lance.

“Have you had sex before?” Lance asked bluntly while Keith pressed lazy kisses against his jaw. Keith paused and furrowed his brows.   


“Yeah? Like, what do you mean?” He asked and resumed. Lance shrugged and played with the sleeve of his teeshirt.

“I mean like…sex sex…penetration I guess.”   


“Have _I_ ever been penetrated?” Keith asked. Lance pursed his lips and then nodded. Keith chuckled. “Are you trying to ask if I’m a bottom?”

“Maybe.” Keith rolled his eyes and pushed himself up to look down at Lance.   


“Trust me. You’d know if I was a bottom,” he murmured before leaning down and kissing him on the mouth. Lance accepted his affections before gently putting some space between them.

“So…you like doing the sticking part,” he said. Keith furrowed his brows.   


“What’s this about?” He asked. Lance looked off and blushed.

“Do you…wanna stick it in me?” He asked quietly. Keith’s brain nearly stopped working when he heard Lance say that. His eyes went wide and his heart stopped.   


“Uh…”

“Was that too much? Sorry…I-I shouldn’t have…” he stopped talking and covered his face. Keith finally snapped out of it and shook his head.   


“Wha— hey, no, it’s okay,” Keith cooed and gently pulled Lance’s hands away from his face. “Sorry, I was just surprised. I wasn’t expecting that,” he explained as Lance blinked up at him.

“Oh…”   


“I…I mean I’ve thought about doing more with you-“

“Then why didn’t you say anything?” Lance interrupted impatiently. Keith furrowed his brows.   


“I didn’t wanna make you uncomfortable. I mean…I think about it differently with you, and I didn’t know if it was even something you’d wanna do,” Keith told him. Lance frowned and knit his brow in concern.

“You…you thought about that?” He almost whispered. Keith nodded.   


“Of course I did. Lance…” he caressed his face. “I care about you so much. I don’t just wanna ‘stick it in you’. I wanna make you feel good and safe and loved,” he told him. Lance reached up and touched the hand on his cheek and smiled.

“Loved?” He repeated back. Keith blushed a little before nodding.   


“Yeah…I want you to feel…absolutely amazing,” he said. Lance grinned and kissed Keith’s palm.

“Thanks…no one has really thought of that before,” he hummed. Keith smiled and sat back.   


“Have you had sex before?” He asked as he peeled off his shirt. It was starting to get warmer, and the AC was always shit. Lance blushed at the sight of Keith’s bare chest before answering.

“Kinda…I went through a really crazy phase a couple summers ago. I slept with like eight guys in six months,” he said. Keith furrowed his brows crawled back on top of Lance.   


“Really? That doesn’t sound like you,” he murmured. Lance nodded in agreement.

“I was kinda just…not in sync with myself…I went to gender therapy for a while after that, and…my therapist and I thought I was trying to dissociate and distance myself from my masculinity. I was like objectifying myself,” he explained. Keith felt a painful squeeze on his heart. “I dunno, I just…I couldn’t be me. I had to be a different version of me. Like the perfect girl who slept around because she was a woman who could get any guy she wanted. I did everything I would want from a one night stand with a girl if I was a guy, and…thinking back to it…I was the most depressed I’ve been in a long time.”

“Lance…”   


“I just…wanted to be someone else. And…at the time I tried to tell myself I wouldn’t regret it and I’d be okay with my decisions, but…” he took a shaky breath. “I wasn’t. I regret all of it so much because it wasn’t me.”

“We all make mistakes, Lance,” Keith assured him. Lance sniffled.   


“Sorry…fuck, I wanted to seduce you. Not make you feel bad for me,” he groaned. Keith smiled and laughed.

“Don’t worry. You could seduce me at anytime, and I’d fall for you,” he hummed and leaned down to kiss him. Lance kissed him back and wrapped his arms around Keith’s neck.

“I wasn’t kidding though. I kinda want you inside me,” he hummed. Keith bit his lip and slipped his hand between Lance’s waist and the bed.   


“Inside you? That’s kinda bold. We haven’t even held hands yet,” he replied and then kissed his neck. Lance hummed and tilted his head back.

“You never tried, and I’m the bottom here so the cards are in your hands,” he mumbled. Keith laughed and pushed Lance’s waist up against him.   


“Right now you’re in my hands,” he whispered. Lance smiled and dug his fingers into Keith’s hair.

“Then play your hand,” he tempted. Keith grinned and scraped his teeth against Lance’s neck.   


“If you insist…”

    It was almost like a high, but so much better. Lance so willing and pliable in Keith’s hands. His body moving and shifting to fit against Keith. His cool fingers sliding against the bare planes of Keith’s skin. His shy and quiet moans as Keith pushed them closer together. It was driving him crazy. It was better than every single one of Keith’s fantasies wrapped up in one. It was real, it was happening, it was _reciprocated_.    


    That’s what threw him the most. For months, he’d been falling harder and harder for this amazing, wonderful, beautiful, fantastic man. A man who could basically have anyone he wanted. A man who was so gentle and kind and warm that decided to share so much of his life with Keith. Keith couldn’t help but pour himself into Lance and kiss him harder, hold him tighter, and love him deeper. He was so incredibly fucked.

“Mm…I wanna have sex with you,” Lance breathed against his lips. Keith bit his lip and pulled back to look at him.   


“Yeah?” He murmured. Lance nodded.

“Yeah…like a lot,” he replied. Keith was in a weird in between of absolutely loving to hear that, and wanting to make sure Lance was actually saying it.   


“I…okay. Yeah…um…”

“I wanna feel you inside me,” Lance whispered as he tried to pull Keith down again.   


“I don’t have any condoms,” Keith told him as he obliged and accepted his kisses.

“That’s okay,” Lance assured him and brought his legs up against Keith’s hips.   


“I feel like we should use one,” Keith mumbled as Lance lead him through a string of kisses.

“I’m clean,” he assured him. Keith then pulled back again and looked down at him.   


“Not what I’m worried about,” he said. Lance pouted and sighed.

“I know.”   


“I know it’s not a fun thing to talk about, but I can’t just ignore that we’re working with compatible baby making parts,” Keith said. Lance turned his head away.

“I’m pretty sure I can’t…make a baby,” he murmured.

“Pretty sure?”

“I mean…it said it could affect fertility…but it also said it’s not a dependable form of birth control,” he replied honestly. Keith leaned down and pressed a sweet kiss against the side of Lance’s neck.   


“We’ll get condoms later, okay? Let’s just do something else,” he suggested.

“But I want you…” Lance murmured.   


“You have me,” Keith promised as he kissed him more. “Every last piece.” Lance let his eyes roll back as Keith sucked and nibbled at his ear. Just the fact that Keith was so close and so bare made Lance want him even more.

“God, I’m so fucking horny,” he sighed. Keith chuckled and kissed his jaw.   


“Is that so?”

“Yeah…I can’t tell if I wanna do absolutely nasty dirty sex or make everything gooey and sappy and sweet,” Lance said and practically melted into the sheets. Keith hummed feigning thought, and merely kissed the side of his mouth.

“We can have sex more than once,” he pointed out. Lance smiled at that and rolled his hips up.   


“That’s true…”

“For now…I think you should let me know what you want me to do to you,” Keith mumbled as he touched under his shirt. Lance bit his lip before kissing him back on the lips.   


“Touch me…” he breathed. Keith grinned and didn’t hesitate to run his hands up and down Lance’s ribs.

“What’s staying on?” He asked next. Lance thought about it for a second before moving his hands up over Keith’s nape.   


“Just…take off my boxers…” he murmured.

    Keith nodded and pulled back to slip the garment down Lance’s legs. He pulled the bottom of his sleep shirt down to cover himself as Keith stripped him, and looked up nervously when Keith tossed his boxers to the side. The look on his face was almost scared, anticipating some kind of backlash or comment. Something that would make him feel defeated.

“Everything okay?” Keith asked coming back down and cradling his face. Lance leaned his cheek into Keith’s palm and felt himself start to tear up.   


“I-I dunno how to go about this…I thought I did, but…I’m not sure what I’m doing,” he replied. Keith pressed a kiss to his forehead.

“Let’s just see how it goes, okay? No need to like…pretend or try…if that makes sense,” they both giggled at that. 

“I mean…just be yourself.”

“…I think I can do that,” Lance whispered back. Keith smiled and then kissed him.   


    There was something thrilling about making your dreams come true. Because Keith truly dreamt of holding Lance so close like this and making him feel so amazing. His one desire was to be the person to make Lance feel good and safe in every aspect of himself. Physically, mentally, emotionally. He wanted it all, and he was so happy to see Lance accept his affections and open up so much.

    It was almost quiet in Lance’s room except for the soft whimpers and moans Keith managed to pry from Lance’s lips. His breath started to rack up and build between them, and Keith loved hearing Lance so mindless with his voice. All he had done was kiss him and touch him, and he was already putty in his hands.

“Fuck… _Keith_ ,” He quivered. Keith groaned and rutted against Lance’s hip. Long tan legs locked around his waist, and he couldn’t help but run his hand over the endless smooth skin.   


“Can I…wanna go down,” Keith mumbled between kisses. 

    Lance seemed torn for a second before nodding as Keith continued to touch and squeeze his legs. It was obvious he was nervous, and when Keith pushed his shirt up until it met his sports bra he was practically shivering. Keith was quick to kiss between his ribs and trail down his happy trail. The sensation of Keith getting closer and closer between his legs mixed with the heat of his lips and his fingers made Lance arch up. A pale hand instantly fit under his spine, and he loved how Keith touched him.

    Everything suddenly felt like it was suspended when Keith actually had his mouth on him. It had been so long since another person had been down there, and he was still yet to ever since he started testosterone. It felt so _different_  from before. His mind more in tune with his body as it felt the things it was experiencing. He let out a tight lipped groan and reached down to grab Keith’s hair.

“Fuck…”   


    Wet hot lips and a terribly precise tongue had a death grip on Lance’s growth. His body trembling with the absolute pleasure Keith washed over him with a simple swipe of his tongue. Lance let out a loud moan when Keith continued his tongue and even started to suck on his flesh. His finger started to poke around, and Lance practically lost it when Keith started to push in. His body was tense, and all he could do was let Keith continue and go at it.

   It was obvious that Keith loved every second of it. His hand gripping Lance wherever they could and holding him down as he sucked and licked him harder. He looked up while stuffing him with another finger, and Lance made eye contact just as Keith pushed up against his plush walls. Lance flung his head back and let out the loudest most languid moan Keith had ever heard. He groaned in response and ground his hips against the bed and lapped up everything Lance gave him. His fingers continue and all Lance could do was babble with random syllables Keith could only imagine were meant to be words.

“Fu…oh, fu… _Keith_ , Jesus fucking… _Christ_ ,” he rambled and really dug his fingers into Keith’s scalp.   


    It was all _so_ _much_. Months of imagining this moment and finally living it made Keith unbelievably hard. He pushed his knees up so he could use his free hand to relieve some of the pressure, and moaned when Lance started rocking his hips against his face. It was everything and more than what Keith could ask for. His jaw starting to ache in an addicting way, and his heart hammering in his chest. The way he looked, the way he talked, the way he moved. It was all so beautiful, and Keith could only watch as he continued showering the other man with the pleasure he deserved.

    Lance tensed up slowly as Keith worked him harder and harder. His muscles tightening and his back bending more and more. His breath came out in short puffs as he neared his climax and gripped Keith’s roots harder. His thighs tight on the sides of Keith’s face, and his knuckles turning white from how hard he held onto his hair. Keith loved every second of it.   


“Ah…aahhh… _shit_ ,” Lance moaned. 

    Keith slipped a third finger in, and that was all it took to unwind him completely. All the tension inside him broke and his body twitched when Keith continued past his orgasm. Lance whimpered when Keith tried to do more, and gently pushed him off. He instead buried his face into Lance’s hip bone and groaned as he fisted his cock. Lance looked down with wide eyes, and could only sit there as Keith finished in his boxers just like that. They were both trying to catch their breath for a moment before Lance said anything.   


“You…um…we…” he trailed off as Keith pulled back and kissed his knee. “Y-you just…ah…”

“You’re so fucking hot,” Keith rasped and crawled between his open legs to kiss him on the mouth. Lance gasped and fell back on the mattress as Keith tiredly mouthed at the side of his face.

“Jesus…I was gonna help,” he muttered as Keith nuzzled his neck.   


“You did…more than enough,” he hummed and kissed Lance’s neck.

“Okay…” he murmured. Keith grinned and pressed another kiss to his jaw.

“You’re perfect.”


	11. Boyfriend

    Lance woke up exactly how he fell asleep. His alarm was supposed to go off, but he could only assume he woke up before it as usual. He cared less about his alarm and more about the weight on top of him. Keith was still heavy on his hips from last night with his head resting peacefully on Lance’s chest. He remembered putting his boxers back on before they passed out, but Keith didn’t do much besides wipe his hands on Lance’s blankets and promptly fall back into place. While Lance wasn’t excited to wash cum off his blankets, he was happy to wake up with Keith still wrapped up in his arms. He smiled and started running his fingers through thick black hair.

    Right on cue, Lance’s alarm went off, and Keith started to wake up. Lance chuckled as he groaned and reached over on his night stand to turn it off. Keith had managed to push himself up by the time Lance turned it off, but he was still rubbing the sleep from his eyes when Lance sat up and kissed his cheek.

“Wake up, sleepy head,” he hummed and untangled his legs from Keith’s waist.   


“Nooooo,” He whined and desperately grabbed Lance’s thigh. That caused him to fall out of the bed and bring Keith down with him.

“Ow, what the hell?” Lance groaned. Keith couldn’t help but laugh and crawl closer.   


“Good morning,” he said. Lance shook his head and got up again.

“I have some time before school. Don’t make me waste it with your inability to wake up,” Lance sassed and walked out into the living room.    


    Keith smirked as he watched him walk out, and then took his time to follow him out into the kitchen. Keith watched Lance grab the eggs from the fridge and the pan from the drying rack. It was still fascinating for Keith to watch Lance oil the pan and start cooking. His eyes followed his flow, and this time he didn’t think twice about coming up behind him and wrapping his arms around his waist. Lance smiled at the sensation and let himself lean back a little.

“Should I put condoms on the shopping list?” Keith mumbled against his neck. Lance giggled and then nodded.

“Most definitely,” he confirmed. Keith nuzzled under his ear before kissing his smooth skin. Lance enjoyed the affection, but focused on the task at hand.

“Y’know your school is like five stops before my school,” Keith hummed. Lance nodded.

“I’m aware.”   


“What time is your lunch?” He asked.

“Five. It’s more of a dinner,” Lance replied.   


“How do you feel about me taking you out somewhere?” Keith proposed. Lance slowed his movements and thought for a moment.

“Uh…where?”   
“Anywhere. You pick,” Keith told him.   


“I dunno. I had an appointment last week-“

“My treat, baby,” Keith assured him and kissed his nape. Lance blushed. Baby?   


“A-Alright…”

“Perfect,” he hummed. “I’ll see you around five.”   


“Okay…”

    Work was dragging on that day. All Keith wanted to do was hop on the bus and see Lance again. He was all he could think about sometimes. His bright smile, his hypnotizing eyes, his wondrous laugh. Just the thought made Keith smile and miss him even more. He had to leave before Lance could finish making them breakfast, but he promised that Lance could make it again the next morning.    


    The bowling alley was slow that day, and it was slowly driving him insane. No matter how many times he checked his watch, he felt like it never budged. Then again, that easily summed up most of his days here. He just wanted to get home and see Lance again. It was less in an obsessive way, and more in a comforting way. Lance made him feel whole again. Lance made him feel okay about himself. He couldn’t recall a single person who seemed to fit him so well. He wanted to spend every second possible with him.

“How’s school going?” Hunk asked on their break. Keith looked up and blinked.   


“Uh…’t’s good…I’m like drowning in homework, but what else is new?” He replied. Hunk chuckled.

“Yeah, you’re telling me. I’m studying engineering,” he said.   


“Fuck, dude. That’s some real shit,” Keith said. Hunk nodded.

“Yeah, it kicks my ass, but I can make it my bitch any day.” Keith laughed.   


“Sounds like an engineering major to me.”

“Yup.”   


“How’s the new cook? Pidge?”

“Oh, she’s okay. Not the best with the recipes yet, but she’s a good worker and a quick learner,” he replied. Keith nodded.   


“Sounds good.”

“Hey, uh…if you don’t mind me asking. What’s up with you and Lance?” He asked. Keith took a sip of his coffee and shrugged.   


“Not much. We’re still living together. Nothing crazy,” he said.

“Is that why you guys are constantly covered in hickeys?” Hunk questioned with a raised brow. Keith blushed and tugged on his collar.   


“We bicker sometimes.”

“Clearly not as much as other things you two do.”   


“We’re…just going with it,” Keith told him.

“Going with it? What’s that mean?”   


“It means…we’re just doing what feels right,” he reiterated. Hunk took that in for a moment before nodding.

“I like that.” Keith smirked.   


“I do too.”

    When his shift finally ended, he couldn’t have gotten to the bus stop fast enough. The ride seemed to drag on forever, and Keith was more than happy to finally get off and walk into Lance’s school. It was still just as busy as the last time he was there, and there was a completely different set of ladies behind the counters. He approached them and smiled.   


“Hey, I’m here for Lance,” he said. The lady nodded with a knowing smile before picking up the phone.

“Lance to the retail floor, Lance to the retail floor,” she called. He nodded as she set down the phone.   


“Thanks.”

“No problem. He’s been kind of excited about this all day,” she said. Keith’s smile widened.   


“Yeah?”

“Oh yeah. He doesn’t really talk about you, but it’s really sweet when he does,” she replied. Keith chuckled.   


“He really is sweet.”

“You’re such a good boyfriend too. Not a lot of the students have someone who would take them out for lunch. Which is like sad, but true,” she said. Keith felt a squeeze on his heart. Boyfriend…   


“Keith!” Lance called as he spotted him from across the retail floor. He was already in his jacket with his bag over his shoulder as he tried not to run across the floor. Keith grinned when he saw Lance, and caught him when he launched himself into Keith’s arms.

“Ohhh my god, my morning has been _crazy_ ,” he said. Keith laughed and squeezed him.

“Tell me all about it over dinner, okay? Where do you wanna go?” He asked.   


“There’s a really good Thai place down the road. My friends all really recommended it,” he said pulling back. Keith nodded and took Lance’s hand.

“Sounds good.” Lance blushed and let Keith lead him out the front doors.   


    It was nice holding Lance’s hand. He was a little disappointed in himself that they were just now getting to this part, but to be fair they didn’t typically walk to places together. Usually, they met up at the apartment or walked the five minutes it took to get to work. Even then, they didn’t always work the same shifts. When it came to it, Keith would rather hold all of him than just his hand. Still, it was nice holding his hand.

    Keith held the door open for Lance, and loved the way he blushed. They sat down and ordered, but Keith barely glanced at the menu. He merely looked at the first thing and ordered it before turning to look at Lance again. They smiled at each other, and Keith couldn’t help but appreciate the happiness in his eyes.

“Tell me about your morning,” he said. Those sparkling eyes rolled.   


“It was…oh god, it was something else,” he groaned. Keith chuckled and sipped his drink.

“What was it?”   


“I had this facial, right? And I’m really _really_ good at facials, not to toot my own horn. Anyways, she was like really loud, and I was so embarrassed because we do facials in one big room so _everyone_  could hear her go on and on about her yeast infection and her dog’s cancer. Like, I feel so bad, but time and place, y’know?”

“That sounds uncomfortable,” Keith said. Lance sighed and leaned his elbow on the table.

“Yeah…How was work this morning?” He asked. Keith’s smile twitched before he shrugged.   


“Kinda boring. I missed you,” he said simply. Lance couldn’t help but try and bite back a smile.

“You did?” He asked. Keith smiled back and nodded.   


“Of course I did.”

“I missed you too. Eating breakfast alone is kinda boring when you have an earlier shift,” he said. Keith nodded.   


“I can imagine. It’s hard to remember what eating breakfast was like before you moved in. My old roommate ate all my food.”

“He doesn’t sound like a very good roommate,” Lance noted. Keith chuckled and shook his head.   


“Yeah, he wasn’t a good roommate at all. Although I’ll admit I enjoyed his cat,” he said.

“Well, we can just get our own cat,” Lance replied casually. 

    Keith felt another squeeze, and he had to take a moment to really process that sentence. Lance didn’t say ‘you should get your own cat’. He didn’t say ‘I’ll just get a cat’. He said ‘we can’. Both of them. Together. They can make that commitment together, and care for it together, and love it together. Like a partner. Like lovers.

“Will you be my boyfriend?” Keith blurted. Lance blinked with big eyes.   


“Oh…Uh…”

“Like…seriously. I know we don’t really put a label on this, but…” He trailed off taking in the surprised expression on Lance’s face. “…but I can’t think of any other person I wanna be with.” Lance was bright red.   


“I-I wasn’t expecting…did…did you plan on asking me this?” He asked. Keith shook his head.

“No, I just—I really like you,” he stumbled over his words. Lance couldn’t help but giggle a little.   


“You’re…I’m sorry, I’m just really caught off guard,” he said smiling bigger and bigger. Keith held his hand again and used his other hand to caress his face.

“Be my boyfriend,” he hummed and kissed his cheek. Lance’s grin softened and he accepted the gentle kiss Keith placed on his lips.   


“…okay,” he whispered. Keith brushed their noses together.

“Yeah?”   


“Yeah. You’ve persuaded me,” he murmured. They laughed and Keith tilted his chin up to kiss him again.

    Unfortunately, Lance’s dinner break didn’t last forever. Even though Keith could sit and listen to him talk forever, Lance eventually had to pull his phone out to check the time and announce that it was time for him to go back. On the short walk back, he tried to explain that he’d totally stay longer if he didn’t have a guest, but Keith assured him it was fine. He opened the door for Lance again and walked him as far as the front desk. Lance then turned to say goodbye.   


“I’ll see you at home?” He asked. Keith nodded.

“Unless you decide to lock me out,” he joked.   


“Don’t tempt me,” Lance smiled and playfully pushed his shoulder. Keith took his hand and easily pulled him closer for one last kiss.

“I’ll see you tonight,” he said letting go of his hand. Lance smiled with bright pink cheeks.   


“Yeah…Okay. Have fun in class,” he said.

“I will, but only because you said so,” Keith replied. Lance shook his head and walked away.   


“Text me when your class is over!” He called as he rushed to set up his station.

   Keith smiled and watched him go about his business. He then blushed when he realized one of the desk ladies was smiling after watching their interaction. He awkwardly turned to leave and get on the next bus. As he road the bus to his campus he couldn’t help but replay the entire evening in his head. The light touches, the sweet kisses, his heart squeezing. He bit his lip and sighed. He really was fucked.


	12. so happy I could die

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Last chapter. Sorry for my inconsistencies aaaaaaaa
> 
> This one is gonna make you feel all warm and fuzzy and also horny I’m sorry

“Girl, you won’t fucking believe it,” Lance said into his phone as he set his stuff down on the kitchen counter. He promptly walked into his room and laid down on his back.

“Tell me,” Shay begged.

“He just…he’s so…and I’m _so_ …”

“In love?” She supplied.

“You know I don’t wanna admit that yet, so no.”

“C’mon, Lance, it’s obvious,” she hummed.

“But seriously…he asked me to be his boyfriend,” Lance told her. Shay was silent for a moment.

“He…wait… _wait_ …” she gasped. “Really? He asked you to be his boyfriend?”

“Yeah, we’re official now. I guess,” he said.

“Wow. I can’t believe it finally happened.”

“Yeah, sorry I couldn’t tell you earlier. I was so busy with those highlights, I was going overtime.”

“Yeah, I saw that so you’re excused.”

“Thank you,” he sighed.

“Seriously though she was looking not so great before she came in. How’d it turn out?”

“Beautiful. Like always,” Lance said with a proud smile.

“I don’t doubt you, but shut up.” Lance laughed and then heard the door open and shut.

“I’ll text you later. Keith just got home,” he said.

“Ooooo, have fun,” she teased. Lance rolled his eyes and hung up. Keith naturally made his way into Lance’s room and immediately greeted him with a kiss.

“Hey,” he said after he pulled back. Lance smiled.

“Hey,” he replied.

“Did you take your binder off?” Keith asked crawling into his bed. Lance nodded.

“I took it off before you came and took me out. I kept my hoodie on all night even though it’s considered against dress code,” he said. Keith smiled.

“The important part is that you’re healthy and you can breath,” he murmured as he rubbed Lance’s back. Lance turned and crawled over to straddle Keith’s hips.

“How was class?” He asked. Keith settled his hands on Lance’s hips and rubbed the top of his pants.

“Alright…I was busy thinking about you,” he replied. Lance shook his head.

“Focus on your studies! You pay for that, you don’t pay for me,” he said. Keith grinned.

“I’d pay a million dollars just to see you,” Keith whispered. Lance blushed and hid his face into Keith’s neck.

“No you wouldn’t.”

“Yes I would,” Keith insisted as he wrapped his arms around the other man. “I’d save up every penny just to see you once.”

“You’re a liar,” Lance muffled against his shirt. Keith chuckled and and let his eyes relax as he lost himself in Lance’s hair. It didn’t take long for Lance to kiss and suck at Keith’s neck, and his grip tightened on the short brown locks.

“Lance…”

“Guess what I picked up before school,” Lance whispered. Keith sighed and cupped his nape as he continued his mouth against his skin.

“Maybe…condoms?” He guessed. Lance giggled before nodding and running his hands down Keith’s chest.

“Good guess,” he said and rocked his hips up. Keith let his head roll back and laughed a little. Lance pulled back.

“What’s so funny?” He asked. Keith shook his head.

“Nothing, I just…” he looked up at Lance. “I’ve kinda really been wanting to…do this with you for a _while_ ,” he confessed. Lance blushed.

“I—Uh…what?” Keith nodded.

“I dunno. We started to get closer and…it started as just wanting to spend more time with you…then I thought about kissing you, and that naturally lead to sex, and…” he trailed off turning a little pink himself. “…I tried not to for a while-“

“Why would you do that? You can think of me anytime you want,” Lance interjected. Keith looked at him and raised a brow.

“Really?” He questioned. Lance bit his lip before looking down at his hands as he sat back on Keith’s hips.

“I uh…I’ve kinda had a crush on you ever since we met,” he confessed. Keith’s brain kinda just stopped for a second. When it started back up again all he could say was…

“What?” Lance buried his hands in his face.

“I’ve had like a huge giant gross crush on you ever since we met and it’s like kinda confusing because we met when I was a girl, but like-”

“The _entire_ time?” Keith asked. Lance sighed and then nodded. “Like…the _entire_  entire time?”

“Yeah…even when I was sleeping with a bunch of dudes.”

“I…”

“Are you freaked out?” Lance asked. Keith shook his head and tried to find different words.

“I just…I didn’t think…like this _whole_ time…you’ve liked me?”

“…Yeah.”

“Fuck…I just…sorry, I’m just…I’m kinda freaking out, but it’s a good thing I promise,” he said. Lance furrowed his brows and let out a little chuckle.

“Freaking out in a good way?”

“Yeah, I…holy shit I was starting to drive myself _insane_  from how much I didn’t want to say anything incase you didn’t like me,” he said.

“Are you kidding? I always thought I was so obvious you could see right through me! I thought you were being so affectionate because you like didn’t wanna point it out,” Lance told him. Keith laughed and shook his head.

“And I thought I was the one who liked you first,” he hummed. Lance smiled and leaned down to kiss him.

“Well, I win that one,” he said. Keith smiled, but it quickly turned into a frown. “What’s wrong?” Lance asked. Keith shook his head.

“You liked me for so long, and…I didn’t even consider you for the longest time,” Keith murmured. Lance frowned as well.

“Yeah… I kinda accepted that it wouldn’t happen. It was just something I thought about in a perfect world,” Lance replied. Keith reached up and cupped Lance’s face.

“You’re amazing. I should’ve recognized that sooner,” he whispered. Lance smiled a little.

“I’m kinda glad you didn’t. You would’ve fallen for a completely different person. Lacey…she was kind of a fake bitch,” he said. They shared a laugh and Keith kissed him.

“I really like you,” he hummed. Lance chuckled.

“I hope you like me, I’m you’re boyfriend.”

“Yeah, do you talk about me at school?” Keith asked with a pleased smile. Lance blushed.

“I mean…a little. Most people talk about their roommates,” Lance defended.

“Granted, but the front desk lady called me your boyfriend,” he pointed out. Lance groaned and shook his head.

“Oh my god, that was probably Sarah, the bitch,” he sighed. “They like to tease me because I’m so obvious.” Keith laughed.

“Well, I liked hearing it.”

“Good. Now let’s make out.”

     Last night still echoed in Keith’s mind. The way Lance moved and itched for Keith’s touch. His less than subtle hints and movements. Watching the way he fell apart with a simple press of his fingers. Just thinking about it was driving Keith mad, and it only took less than a minute of making out before Keith had Lance pinned again. His hand going immediately to the front of his pants. Lance yelped in surprise and Keith instantly pulled back.

“Are you okay? Was that too much?” He asked. Lance shook his head.

“No, I just…didn’t expect that,” he replied. Keith blushed and returned to his boyfriend.

“Sorry…I got a little excited.”

“I mean, I’m not complaining. Just surprised,” Lance smiled. Keith smiled back and resumed his kissing. Eventually he returned his hand to the front of his pants again. 

“Hold on,” Lance gently pulled away and undid his jeans to reach inside. He pulled out his packer and tossed it to the side. “Sorry.” Keith laughed and shook his head.

“It’s okay,” he replied and continued.

     Keith was quickly learning that Lance was extremely sensitive. He barely pressed between his legs and the other man let out a heavy breath. Their lips slowly and lazily moving with each other as Keith progressively got more bold with his fingers until he was pressing firmly and running his thumb over the area that made Lance shudder the most. It was then that Lance stopped kissing and just panted against Keith’s lips. He smirked and pressed hard and slow as he bit his lip.

“I-I wasn’t kidding about the condoms,” he wheezed. Keith nodded.

“Where are they?” He asked.

“Mmm…bag. I think I left it by the door.”

“I’ll be right back,” Keith promised and pressed a quick kiss to his cheek.

     It took Keith less than a minute to dart out of the room and find Lance’s bag. He rummaged through it and found a box along with a bottle of lube. He elected to bring both, and darted back into Lance’s bedroom. The other man had continued putting pressure between his legs, and Keith loved the sheepish look on his face when Keith came back. He dropped the supplies on the bed and crawled between his long beautiful limbs. Lance watched shyly as Keith pulled his pants down and off.

“Sh-shirt stays on still,” Lance stuttered.

“Hoodie?” Keith asked. Lance nodded.

“That too…”

“I think I can live with that.” He hummed and started kissing his knee. 

     Lance sighed at the contact and watched as Keith touched and caressed his skin. He made his way down his thigh, and eventually pulled back again to strip him of his boxers. After that, and with no barrier between them, Keith didn’t hesitate to lick up Lance’s growth. He was already a little wet, and Keith lapped it up instantly. Lance gasped at the first touch, and trembled as Keith continued.

“God…” he sighed and let his head fall back. 

     Keith swirled his tongue before closing his lips and gently sucking. Lance whimpered and shot his hand down to hold Keith’s head closer. His legs drew in again, and Keith reached around them to grip his hips.

     Watching the other man unfold was always a thrill for Keith. The fact that a simple slide of his tongue could make Lance dissolve was the most satisfying thing in the universe. He gripped the other man’s hips harder, and pushed up some of his hoodie to touch and to squeeze more. Lance whimpered and let go of Keith to reach back and grip the sheets. He let out a moan as Keith pressed his tongue harder against his growth and then started to poke around. His fingers took over, and Lance groaned at the digits inside him. Keith took that opportunity to pull his mouth away and get a better look at Lance as his eyes rolled back in pleasure. He pushed his fingers up, and Lance furrowed his brows while breathing out tiny moans. He opened his eyes and made eye contact with Keith. His face was already bright red, but after that his blush was so much deeper.

“You’re fucking amazing,” Keith breathed and pushed in a third finger. Lance arched his back and ran his foot over Keith’s pants.

“Fuck me,” Lance murmured. Keith let out a shivering moan and rested his forehead on Lance’s knee.

“God, you’re so…” he trailed off and focused on his fingers inside the other man. Lance moaned and rocked his hips.

“Please…ahh…I… _please_ ,” he begged.

     Keith cursed and pulled his hand away to strip himself. Lance rubbed his thighs together impatiently as Keith tossed his clothes and grabbed the condom and the lube. When he returned Lance’s hand had made itself Keith’s replacement once again. He pulled his fingers away to fill him with his own instead. Lance clamped onto Keith’s neck and went on to leave about a dozen love bites up and down his bare chest. Keith groaned and curled his fingers faster.

“You’re…Jesus, you’re so…”

“So what? Tell me,” Lance whispered against his collarbone. Keith groaned.

“God, you’re so _fuckable_ ,” he growled. Lance moaned and rocked his hips.

“Then fuck me already,” he tempted and opened his legs more. 

     Keith removed his hand and wiped it off so he could properly open the condom packet. Lance sat up and kissed his neck while he pulled his boxers down. He allowed Lance to take the condom and roll it down his length. It was maddening to see his delicate fingers slide down the flesh, and it was ecstasy when he grabbed the lube to continue sliding back up and squeezing him in just the right places. He gripped Lance’s shoulders and shuddered at the giggle that rang in his ears.

“So sensitive,” he hummed.

“Sensitive ‘cause it’s you,” Keith mumbled and let out a gasp when Lance rubbed against his head.

“Yeah, me too. Funny how amazing it feels when it’s the right person,” Lance said as he lean forward to kiss Keith’s chest. 

     That was the moment Keith realized Lance had a tight hold on his heart. Every squeeze he felt came from the other man, and he lost count how many times he squeezed. It was almost like he was the reason Keith’s heart even beat in the first place, his chest full of emotion and adoration whenever the other man was around. He couldn’t help but grab Lance’s face and kiss him deeply and as sweetly as he could with how on edge he was. Lance reciprocated and pulled his hand away to wrap around Keith’s neck and pull him back on top of him.

“You’re so right. I’ve never felt this way about someone before,” Keith murmured against his lips. Lance whimpered and nuzzled against his neck.

“I’m so gonna fall for you. Jesus Christ,” he gasped.

     It totally escaped Keith’s mind that they were trying to have sex until Lance reached for his cock again. He reached down himself and gently guided himself between Lance’s legs. The moment he started to push in he groaned and let his head hang limp. The warm hot pleasure too much for him to think about anything except for the man underneath him. Lance coaxed him into moving further, and Keith caged his head with his forearms. Lance ran his hands down Keith’s ribs and sides before reaching back and running his nails down his back.

“ _Fuck_ , you’re thicker than you look,” Lance mumbled and tossed his head back as Keith pushed all the way in. He immediately leaned down to kiss Lance sweetly, and then started to move.

“ _Oh_ , Christ, you’re really fucking thick,” he moaned. Keith rolled his hips up, and Lance squeaked.

“You like thick?” He asked moving his lips against Lance. The other man nodded as his nails dug harder into Keith’s back.

“I— _aahhh!_  Y-yeah, I… _fuck_ holy _shit_ ,” he babbled as Keith continued rolling and rocking into him.

“Feel so good…so tight…” Keith clenched his teeth and pulled out a fraction of an inch before shoving himself inside again. Lance gasped and dragged red rivers down Keith’s pale back.

“Fuck, do that again right now,” Lance demanded and scrambled his hands up to Keith’s upper back. Keith did as he was asked, and Lance turned to jelly.

“Again… _please_ …a-and keep…keep doing that . Fuck me,” he begged. Keith kissed him again and started pulling out and shoving his cock back in roughly. Lance let out a pleased moan and rolled his hips with Keith’s.

“Geez…” Keith panted as he started to pick up the pace. 

     Lance let out a small shout with each slap of their hips, and Keith ate up every last one of them. Despite his hard pace, he showered Lance with gentle kisses on his neck and sweetly making out with him. Lance accepted all of it and pulled his thighs closer to his chest. He cried out at the angle, and then settled his ankles over Keith’s shoulders. He groaned and pulled back to kiss the inside of his calf.

“How are you so fucking perfect,” he rasped. Lance whined and ran his hands down Keith’s chest.

“Ahh…I-I…”

     He trailed off as Keith reached down to rub his thumb against Lance’s growth in a stroking way. It made him completely dissolve into the sheets and he came within five seconds of Keith’s added stimulation. Just watching Lance unwind like that was enough for Keith to stutter his hips and quickly follow with his climax. He stayed there gasping for breath while Lance was laid back and blissed out. Eventually Keith pulled out, took off the condom, and returned to Lance to put his boxers back on. He was too drained to put his own boxers on, so he merely fell back between Lance’s legs and wrapped his arms around his waist. Lance smiled and made a pleased noise before cradling his head.

“Are you happy?” Keith mumbled. Lance grinned.

“So happy, I could die,” he replied. Keith chuckled.

“Me too…”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading my story! I really appreciate it :)

**Author's Note:**

> Add me on Snapchat and comment your username to be added to my secret reader storyyyyyyyy
> 
> ksenialynns


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